From ISC Department of State, Ambassadorial Division
On behalf of the:
Klingon Emperor and High Council
Romulan Praetor and Imperial Senate
Lyran King & Dukes
ISC Council
To: All pilots, active, semi-retired, retired, on leave, AWOL, out-to-lunch, gone fishing, etc.
Subject: Military Recall for Operation "Slave Girls 3"
Text:
It seems the Alliance of Evil has claimed that they are in reality the "Good Guys", and, by Imperial Mandate, they believe it is their desitiny to conquer the universe. I heard something about a (drunkenly induced) cartoon-vision of the great Bethke supposedly sending the Gorn Tri-Bruce Council on a quest to find the "Holy Tequila Bottle". This is not well, my friends.
In reality, it is well known that we, of the Coalition, are in all actually the "Friggin' Good Guys", so pronounced by an ancient Earther. That declaration was made in Earth Year 1991, see the archived transmissions from a "President Bush" about that.
As you may be able to plainly see, the Federation "petaq's" have begun their frequent military recalls (again) in an effort to win the server the only way it seems they are able to. They wish to infest the server with a plague of ships, hoping the sheer numbers of vessels are the only way to overcome self-perceived "deficiencies in the photon torpedo."
It is also rumored that the ISC has developed a counter-weapon to the only Federation weapon that threatens our forces, the great "KRolling Pin". Yes, all ships will be armed with "cookie dough mines". It is a well known fact that, given a choice between baking and whacking, the rolling pin will bake before whacking. And it is also known that unless extremely seriously aggrivated (to the point that all china is broken and the cookware is dented), a dirty rolling pin that was used for baking will not be used against anything else. Therefore, until their scientists arm their ship with Rolling Pin racks, china launchers and pan deployers, we are safe from their scourge.
Are numbers are traditionally few, but all our captains are elite. We shall need your skills once more to counter the infestimal plague, stains, and poor letter-writers (they can only write in hex...) that once again threaten to infest the galaxy. Please, we beseech you, to spend whatever time you are able to in the grand defense of all that is right and just in the galaxy, and assist in the "pacification" of the Alliance Barbaric Heathens
(hey, this did come through the ISC after all...)
On behalf of those who are rightfully destined to maintain order in the galaxy.
Topic: (Shameless) Coalition Recruiting Thread, ISC edition... (Read 989 times)