Topic: Good Ol Klink, Fed Flame war by request (Read 10433 times)

Hondo_8 · « **on:** May 05, 2003, 12:18:41 am »

Klinks smell bad, ill mannered, ugly, fungus on there feet, leather that has gone bad, ridges on there foreheads that that a Hockey Golie would be jealouse of, and and have bad tabble manners.

Mog · « **Reply #1 on:** May 05, 2003, 06:23:05 am »

And going by the above post, the Federation education system sucks ass

gornrule · « **Reply #2 on:** May 05, 2003, 06:59:13 am »

<in best Sean Connery accent>

'So, ya wanna start a flame war? I'll tell ya how to start a flame war. He brings a knife, you bring a gun, he puts one of yours in the hospital, put one of his in the morgue. THAT'S the flame war way. And THAT's how you'll get Capone.'

Gwarlock

KBF-Standarte · « **Reply #3 on:** May 05, 2003, 08:33:28 am »

Clearly Star Fleet Academy features low standards for communication skills (as Captain Mog indicates). Reminds me once of a Federation captain who proclaimed, moments before the sudden demise of his pummelled ship, "Damn, it's good to be in the Federa..."

J'inn · « **Reply #4 on:** May 05, 2003, 08:49:47 am »

Now this is more like it. Check is in the mail Hondo.

If there is going to be strife on these boards I'd rather it had to do something with Star Trek. Therefore, good old Fed v. Kling bashing just seems so right.

If I want to hear political stuff I'll watch my most hated TV show of all time . . . Crossfire (a/k/a Politics meets the WWF).

DH123 · « **Reply #5 on:** May 05, 2003, 09:34:39 am »

3 words:

FRICKING GOOD GUYS!!!!!!!!

jimmi7769 · « **Reply #6 on:** May 05, 2003, 09:42:35 am »

Quote:

Klinks smell bad, ill mannered, ugly, fungus on there feet, leather that has gone bad, ridges on there foreheads that that a Hockey Golie would be jealouse of, and and have bad tabble manners.

I'll have you know I have very good table manners............

Maxillius · « **Reply #9 on:** May 05, 2003, 10:27:05 am »

I bet the plasma races would stop whining about G racks if our D racks were never-ending like the rest of our plasma

DONOTDELETE · « **Reply #10 on:** May 05, 2003, 10:29:47 am »

COOL! A "GOOD" flame war!

OUT-FRICKING-STANDING!!

Unfortunately, I now have to end the war with only one UBER-Salvo...

THere aint never, EVER been a Klink that hasnt got his ass WHIPPED by Captain James T. MOTHER-F#CKING KIRK BABY!!

Even when Kirk was an old, fat Admiral he whipped Klink ass.

THE FEDERATION RULES!*

*disclaimer: We are speaking of the SFB/TOS/TMP versions of Star Trek; the spinless, "PC" Federation of the 24th century is a bunch of bedwetting crybabies out for a sunday joyride. Hell, they have a damn bumpy-head working on their FLAGSHIP, WTF IS UP WITH THAT?!?!?

Those responsible for the hiring of a klink on a Federation Starship have been sacked. (GR was puffing a big, fat blunt that day I suppose.)

Klinks suck so bad they started using P-1 and Photons to try to keep up with the Feds, pitiful. And they even allied with the spinless Feds of the 24th century, after the Feds TRIED to save them from some ROMULANS at Khitomer!! HAHAHAHAHHA!

Have a nice day, you bumpy headed devils! ;D

J'inn · « **Reply #18 on:** May 05, 2003, 11:01:19 am »

On behalf of the American Bar Association I would like to express our sincere pleasure at the number of disclaimers attached to recent posts. We do so like proper posting. And if it doesn't have a disclaimer, it is just not proper.

That being said; we are terrible distressed at the fact that these disclaimers have not been crafted by our membership. While some may not realize this, the term "kawinky dink" is simply not a proper legal term and really has no basis in a disclaimer. Well perhaps in a parole hearing, but otherwise, not.

So, I, J'inn the Loving, have been nominated to rectify this situation. Please e-mail the following to me and I will craft a iron clad disclaimer for you. Please niot that the quality of the disclaimer will be directly proportional to the amount of your fee. You get what you pay for.

Please use the following form:

What is the subject of your post?

(If it involves G Racks, shiplists or a member of the banned brothers, your cost will double)

Does your post contain curse words?

(Triple the cost unless you use the )(*$($($*$ stuff)

Does your post mention Derek Smart?

(Quadruple the cost)

Are you a Federation player telling Dogmatix to STFU?

(Double the cost)

Are you even thinking of mentioning the differences between SFC2 and SFC3?

(You can't afford it)

Is your post in all Caps?

(Forget it, to hard for me to read)

Are you Chuut Ritt

(Triple the cost and I'll need a full waiver from you)

Are you Kroma BaSyl?

(<shudder> Please stop sending the pictures)

Is it about an active campaign and you are absolutely certain your team is getting screwed?

(Just send me my Porche now)

Is it about how great and wonderful a guy J'inn is?

(Well you don't need no disclaimer for that!)

Are you hooch and angry?

(Triple)

Are you Mace and angry?

(Triple)

Are you Max Power and angry?

(Triple)

Are you jd and really peeved?

(Ooo I can finally buy that yacht!)

ARe you going to even mention the SFC3 patch issue?

(Great!! Now I can hire babes for the yacht!)

Please do not deviate from the form. Thanks.

KAT J'inn
Proud Member of the ABA where our motto is: How may we help us?

DONOTDELETE · « **Reply #20 on:** May 05, 2003, 11:04:41 am »

He didnt beat Kang, but that was a rigged contest. He DID get Kang off his ship and taking a taxi ride on a Fed Starship HAS to be dishonorable to a Klink, hence Kirk edges out a tactical win from the situation.

Have a nice day!

DONOTDELETE · « **Reply #21 on:** May 05, 2003, 11:08:22 am »

End of Kirks lineage???

Did you never WATCH the show? That man has more bastard children than the average klink has bodily odors, which is quite a few in fact.

Oh, and perhaps you have never heard the phrase: The winners write the HISTORY BOOKS! SCOREBOARD!

rofl!

Oh, and its ALL Earther versions, as the Klinkon empire has bowed in submission to the UFP and allied with em!

Have a nice day!

Karnak · « **Reply #23 on:** May 05, 2003, 11:24:38 am »

I think Fed female POWs that lose the uniform for scanty two piece costumes, are spray-painted green and put on the power-red lipstick can be really provocative when they slap us Klingon Alumnus and say:

"Oooh!! That must have hurt!!"

wanderer · « **Reply #25 on:** May 05, 2003, 11:46:00 am »

Heheh, you gotta deal, Dog...Fed/Klink diplomacy at it's best...

Btw, that *BOOM* that interupted my officer was his photons thacking into that paper-mache you guys call a hull...

Fluf · « **Reply #29 on:** May 05, 2003, 11:55:03 am »

No disclaimers!

Feds:

Magic Photons

G-Racks

Noobs

Wanna be droners

Klinks:

Butt Ugly

Weak Minds

Weak Hulls

Wanna be droners

Have a nice day!

KRolling · « **Reply #31 on:** May 05, 2003, 12:00:01 pm »

Ooooooooo OOOOOOO!!!

I got one!!!!

Kirk had all of the Klingon women!!!!

SSCF Hooch · « **Reply #33 on:** May 05, 2003, 12:05:39 pm »

Dear Klingon War Criminals, (pooftas)

To quote the patron saint, let his name be forever raised high:

"Let them die" are the first words all Federation warriors are taught at SFA. We hate Klingons, we will always hate Klingons, and will never be willingly allied with them, unless we need cannon fodder to suck up plasma from PF's from the "lessor" races. (Mirak not withstanding)

disclaimer
Screw your disclaimers...Federation Captains hate Klingons and ignore Romulans, Miraks, ISC, Lyrans (unicorns), Hydrans. They are our sometime lackeys. (RP boys, lower your weapons

)

Hooch

SSCF Hooch · « **Reply #34 on:** May 05, 2003, 12:08:26 pm »

From reading the books I know that the worst Klingon insult is "you have no name", not a one of ya's.

Harold Nez · « **Reply #36 on:** May 05, 2003, 12:19:58 pm »

All Feds are wannabe Kirks. The only ships Klinks can win in are the d5d and other various cheese chuckers.

Peace.

warsears · « **Reply #38 on:** May 05, 2003, 12:30:04 pm »

All Feds are a bunch of 5th grader that think they should win every game because thats the way it is on TV.
hehe

L0vetobowl · « **Reply #44 on:** May 05, 2003, 01:14:41 pm »

Ahhhhhh....(sniff)..I must be the 4th reader. Hehe klingons get it worse later on, their disruptors can't even seem to hit the broad side of a warping barn

FPF_TraceyG · « **Reply #47 on:** May 05, 2003, 02:06:50 pm »

A historian in the 31st century is idling looking through some old records of the predecessor to the United Federation of Galaxies brought back by one his esteemed colleague, Indiana Kirk. Indiana is rumoured to be one of many descendants of a legendary starship captain and has been researching his family tree.
Amongst the data brought back is a reference to an obscure and ancient civilization once called, the Klingon Empire, long ago vanquished by natural selection. There failure to survive apparently was related to a curious habit following their mating rituals that required them to run off down to the pub and tell all their mates about it. Soon, the pub ritual became a cultural event in it's own right, and fellow Klingon Warriors would travel from far and wide to partake in all manner of activities to celebrate the occasion. In true Klingon Warrior spirit, many contests were held, the most favorite of these being the 'wet t-shirt contest'. Klingon battlecry's could be heard from one end of Q'onos to the other whilst the bloodwine flowed freely, "Show us ya G-Racks!".
Unfortunately, whilst the more fragile sex of the species was engaging in these festivities, the Klingon women, guided by two Federation benefactors (who's names are witheld on the grounds I might be incriminated, and known only by their code names, the Photon Goddess, and the Rolling Pin of Destruction), formed a new autonomous self-governing body, who's first act was to create the Subjugated People's Emancipation Relief Mandate bank. Oblivious to their now redundant status, the male Klingons of the society eventually took on a new role, reflected by the diaper change tables on the bridges of all their starships. The newly developed Diatomic IntraPhase Lightwave Dissemination Odometer technology, among many new scientific breakthroughs during the following Matriarchy, however, occasionally had power failures, and it was only for this reason alone that the male of the species were kept around at all, as a token gesture.

J'inn · « **Reply #48 on:** May 05, 2003, 02:24:05 pm »

Now that's funny. A little scary but funny.

<calls stock broker and triples holding position with Duracell asnd EverReady>

J'inn · « **Reply #49 on:** May 05, 2003, 02:47:10 pm »

Hmmm what race to fly for SG3? A serious question.

Photon and Drone cheese?
Drone cheese with some now lowfat commado cheese sauce?
Pure drone cheese with a side of fighter fondu?
fighter cheese
PF cheese
the other PF cheese
PPD cheese
or we wish we had cheese or players for that matter

Hmmmmmm.

DONOTDELETE · « **Reply #51 on:** May 05, 2003, 02:59:24 pm »

Hey dog, until you come up with some KLINK propoganda that was broadcast on galactic cablevision, your cant talk about OUR propoganda, so there! (You ruffle heads even tried to steal Hamlet!)

Weve got so many different series of propoganda that WE are actually getting tired of watching it.

But uh, your still ugly and your mama dresses your funny.

And now a word from our propoganda sponsors:

TRIBBLE!

Have a nice day!

DONOTDELETE · « **Reply #53 on:** May 05, 2003, 03:07:06 pm »

I interrupt this flame war to say that if someone actually comes up with WORKING Tholians, I AM IN!!!!

Gotta have at least web, if not web casters tho. Rocks without web are just funny klinks without dizzys.

We now return you to the flame war:

YEAH! The klinks cant even take out a bunch of ROCKS that invaded their space. Only have one planet, and ships that they build in monster garage on sunday afternoons.

Have a nice day!

KRolling · « **Reply #56 on:** May 05, 2003, 04:29:27 pm »

Good one, TraceyG!! LOL!

KRolling · « **Reply #59 on:** May 05, 2003, 05:36:43 pm »

<WHACK!!!>

Hondo_8 · « **Reply #65 on:** May 05, 2003, 10:35:30 pm »

Brief History of the Klingon Empire.

.

Thank you.

Hondo the Master Sage

KBF-Standarte · « **Reply #68 on:** May 06, 2003, 12:05:08 am »

Brief History of the Klingon Empire.

.

I am guessing that this sterling effort that you put forth while in Star Fleet Academy earned you an "A+" in the Galactic History 101 class. No grammar, spelling, diction, or syntax deductions though . . .

Harold Nez · « **Reply #72 on:** May 06, 2003, 01:18:43 pm »

LOL, the really funny thing is I got stuck as a Fed on LB3 because I clicked buttons too fast in the beginning. I suck balls at Fed (although I only lost to one Klink, WS who made me eat missiles, gj). All my comments were meant as jokes in the spirit of this thread. I apologize for starting a real flame war in the fake flame war thread (only on these boards could anything like that ever be said

). Peace.

wanderer · « **Reply #73 on:** May 06, 2003, 01:24:33 pm »

<scratches head>...what "real" flame war?

KDS-KYTARH · « **Reply #75 on:** May 06, 2003, 06:22:46 pm »

See the feds Idea of sex is Rolling Pin Whacking off Hooch on the internet.

And what is this Rolling Pin thing but some huge case of swollen penis envy.

Is that a rolling pin in your blue spandex or are you just glad to see me ROFL.

Oh and Hondo do I have to remind YOU how many times THIS KLINGON has hiden your liquor stash from the Federation Council, Hidden your hot tub from the Federation Counsil, hidden your NURSES from the federation council, smuggled you parts for your hot tub, smuggled you liquor, met you in deep space to refit your ship after starfleet command stripped your hot tub from your bridge. Not to mention the times in other threads I have towed your ship to the neutral zone and left it for you to pick up ,, complete with nurse and hot tub intact,, although there ws that time with the leather Nurse I realy grew fond of that one, she had a bigger rack than Tracy G and could actually keep up with Klingon love making,, Man she was awsome.

Not to mention the many druken parties we have sponsored together on uninhabited planets in the neutral zone.

Hondo just wait until the next time you need a place to stash your supply of drink umbrellas!

KBF-Dogmatix · « **Reply #77 on:** May 06, 2003, 08:00:51 pm »

Six transporters. Eight t-bombs. Want some!?

KBF-Dogmatix · « **Reply #82 on:** May 07, 2003, 03:50:02 pm »

Well, golly...I've been known to lay down a quick t-bomb barrage or two in my day....

Did so just this morning, as a matter of fact...

Kroma_BaSyl · « **Reply #83 on:** May 07, 2003, 04:12:07 pm »

Anyone got a hanger, the T-bomb I just dropped is clogging the toilet.

DONOTDELETE · « **Reply #84 on:** May 07, 2003, 06:04:02 pm »

A Gorn on the crapper is NOT an image I had ever cultivated, but one that is now indelibly burned into my psyche.

I will send you my therapy bill.

On a more logical note, I wonder what color Gorn po.... no, scratch that.

Have a nice day!

SBOGuardianZeRo · « **Reply #85 on:** May 07, 2003, 06:32:04 pm »

well i can't claim to know the color of gorn poo, but i know its the only thing as bad as gorn plasma ballet

Hondo_8 · « **Reply #87 on:** May 12, 2003, 07:32:42 pm »

Dear Mr. Klink

The Federation would like to support any and all future hostilties with our races, it seems that there has been a weakening on your side of the Deal, You are no longer inspiring fear and hatred in our Federation Captains. We feel that if our partnership for mutaul Racial hatred is to remain intact you must start picking up the pace. We feel that if this contiuned lovy dovy attitudes persits that Gow will begin to grow soft and actually fly Allied with the Federation one day. As we both know GOW is pinnicle of achievment for Bashing our Feds. So we hope you can strive to emulate him more and more. In a recent Gallop poll 87% surveyed felt Hooch was Dishing it better then Dogmatix. Out of those 87% 75% actually belive that Dogmatix is really the reincarnation of Fred Rogers and the Klingon Empire a recreation of the Fantasy Magical Kingdom.

If you can not tolerate the heat or feel you need to drop this a notch your more then welcom to repick your Racial Enemy. Be advised that there are Captains in the Federation that feel the Romulans should asscend to the top of our Racial enanimity. We only tell you this for our long and gloryified past. We can not continue this partnership if you are going to go soft on us, we will be forced to move on. Thank you for you time and may all your ships smell like spring flowers after a rainy day.

Toasty0 · « **Reply #89 on:** May 13, 2003, 08:53:02 am »

Fed--

Do you honestly assume that I, a klingon warrior, believe that you, a weak and pathetic human, possess any other fighting skill than that of a whimpering dog?

Toasty0

KBF-Standarte · « **Reply #90 on:** May 13, 2003, 11:34:31 pm »

Klingons get the last word. Let's face it. Klingons are in charge. Flame war ends - break out the Bloodwine Warriors.

KBF-Standarte · « **Reply #92 on:** May 14, 2003, 11:48:16 am »

Not.

News:

Topic: Good Ol Klink, Fed Flame war by request (Read 10433 times) var addthis_config = {"data_track_clickback":true};

Hondo_8

Mog

gornrule

KBF-Standarte

J'inn

DH123

jimmi7769

Hondo_8

wanderer

Maxillius

**DONOTDELETE**

KRolling

jimmi7769

wanderer

KBF-Dogmatix

KBF-Dogmatix

KBF-Dogmatix

KBF-Dogmatix

J'inn

KRolling

**DONOTDELETE**

**DONOTDELETE**

wanderer

Karnak

KBF-Dogmatix

wanderer

SSCF Hooch

Kroma_BaSyl

KBF-Dogmatix

Fluf

wanderer

KRolling

wanderer

SSCF Hooch

SSCF Hooch

KBF-Dogmatix

Harold Nez

wanderer

warsears

KBF-Dogmatix

SSCF Hooch

DH123

KBF-Dogmatix

J'inn

L0vetobowl

SSCF Hooch

Kroma_BaSyl

FPF_TraceyG

J'inn

J'inn

DH123

**DONOTDELETE**

FatherTed

**DONOTDELETE**

Harold Nez

Maxillius

KRolling

KBF-Dogmatix

SSCF Hooch

KRolling

SSCF Hooch

FPF_TraceyG

Kroma_BaSyl

FPF_TraceyG

warsears

Hondo_8

KBF-JD

KBF-JD

KBF-Standarte

Maxillius

Kroma_BaSyl

DH123

Harold Nez

wanderer

Topic: Good Ol Klink, Fed Flame war by request (Read 10433 times)

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