This thread has made me think deeply about these films, and I've come to realize that everything I find distasteful about the plot was done very deliberately.
Early in the film, we see the sun filter through a tender young Spocks ears. There were no special effects, just beautiful photography and prosthetics, so Spock's ears were the color you'd expect of a boy. Of course, those of us who grew up with ST knew that Spock was only half human and favored his Vulcan side, down to the color of his blood being green instead of red. If you didn't follow ST, this wouldn't bother you at all. At first blush, this would appear to be an innocent mistake, overlooked because it was such a beautiful shot, but as you watch more Abrams' ST, you see more wierd discontinuitous teasers.
In "A piece of the Action," the silly original series gangster episode, you could not have missed in almost 50 years of re-runs, we learned that Kirk couldn't drive a stick. In Abrams' film, he seemed to handle the gears of a museum piece like he was born to it.
In the last film, were are teased with the mother of Kirk's son stripping in front of him for no reason at all, except to produce a publicity shot. When you think deeper, you have to wonder how that even got into the script, except as an inside joke. If I enjoyed watching these films, or were deeper into the ST story arc, I'm sure I could find a lot more of things that look like inside jokes.
Now, think of all the people that go to ST conventions and holloween parties as ST Vulcans. These folks make up characters for themselves and live the fantasy beyond the show. Could you think of a better way to tell these people that they are a bunch of losers than blowing up their fantasy world?
Abrams' ST is a mean spiritted joke. This isn't somebody making a bad film, because they, "don't get 'Trek,'" or they are merely incompetent. This is like some 13 year old menace walking up to a five year old and breaking his toy in front of him. Abrams is laughing at all the trekkies.
I waited 2 years to see Star Trek Into Darkness. I'll try to put off Star Wars VII for 7. I didn't like Lost, or any other Abrams' production, so it has to suck. Then again, has anybody seen Mel Brook's The Producers?