Topic: Scientific Conversions

[Sirgod]

Scientific Conversions

1. Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter = Eskimo Pi
2. 2000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton
3. 1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 microscope
4. Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement = 1 bananosecond
5. Weight an evangelist carries with God = 1 billigram
6. Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour = Knotfurlong
7. 16.5 feet in theTwilight Zone = 1 Rod Serling
8. Half of a large intestine = 1 semicolon
9. 1,000,000 aches = 1 megahurtz
10. Basic unit of laryngitis = 1 hoarsepower
11. Shortest distance between two jokes = A straight line
12. 453.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake
13. 1 million-million microphones = 1 megaphone
14. 2 million bicycles = 2 megacycles
15. 365.25 days = 1 unicycle
16. 2000 mockingbirds = 2 kilomockingbirds
17. 52 cards = 1 decacards
18. 1 kilogram of falling figs = 1 FigNewton
19. 1000 milliliters of wet socks = 1 literhosen
20. 1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche
21. 1 trillion pins = 1 terrapin
22. 10 rations = 1 decoration
23. 100 rations = 1 C-ration
24. 2 monograms = 1 diagram
25. 4 nickels = 2 paradigms
26. 2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital = 1 IV League
27. 100 Senators = Not 1 decision


Stephen

[FoaS_XC]

.......*groan*

[762_XC]

*snort*

[Capt. Mike]

Stephen, have you been hanging around the calibration forum again?  http://www.pmelforum.com/index.php  Those are the kind of terrible puns we use on each other.

Mike

[Sirgod]

LOL, I'll have to check that out now. Metrology and all.

Stephen

EDIT: Found this gem by our own Capt. Mike over there.

During his first three years of marriage, Frank — a big DIYer — tackled several huge home-improvement projects. At first, Frank's wife Pat loved how their house had shaped up beautifully and without a great deal of cost.

But Pat gradually realized she was lonely and increasingly frustrated that she had, in effect, lost her man to his passion for projects. After Frank forgot their fourth anniversary, Pat announced that she had enrolled them in a Marriage Weekend (see clean marriage joke).

During the weekend, Frank tried to listen to the instructor, but Pat noticed that he'd often nod off or doodle on project plans on the back of his handouts. "It's essential," said the instructor, "that spouses know what's important to each other. So men, can you name and describe your wife's favorite flower?"

Frank leaned over, touched Pat's arm gently and whispered, "Gold Medal All-Purpose, isn't it?"

Thus began Frank's life of celibacy  .

Stephen