It needs to be okay that its not your dad's trek, I think. There is always going to be someone who objects. Look at it from the perspective of the non-trekkies, to them, Trekkies are an isolated breed. I really think this is an opportunity to show Non-Trekkies what Star Trek could be like. A cynic would say "well, if we have to mutate it for mainstream, then its not trek" and thats not neededly true. I have faith in Abrams. Lets let abrams show non-trekkies what trek is about. And lets keep an open mind - maybe it will be enjoyable to us, too.
Its like the story of galileo five on west wing. President Bartlet hosts a board of NASA experts on TV-in-classrooms to show students whats happening. They were looking for a broader topic and its turns out that NASA lost contact - its not about the probe, its about the fact that some kid in the back row who's afraid of raising his hand gets to see that sometimes its okay to mess up, even the experts do it.
There's a broader theme here at this movie, too. Its not just about satisfying trekkies, or trek lore, or even sylar-lovers. Its about creating an opportunity to show non-trekkies what trek can do. Maybe, there will be a few non-trekkies who go "you know, maybe its not so dorky after all, maybe there's something to it." If that happens, I'd love to be the guy who swoops in and be like "yeah, I'm a trek fan, and I gotta say, a lot of people have it all their preconceptions wrong - im glad to see you enjoyed it" even if I hear of one guy who says that I think the broader point of the movie is reached.
People have asked me why I'm such a trek fan. I tell them its the same reason that I'm a Lord of the Rings fan - there's so much Lore, there's so much history, there's so much in the universe that you dont even hear about in the show/movies. Its so rich. Look what those movies did for the franchise. I know dozens of people who went to the books after they saw the flicks and really enjoyed it. I've always been so bummed when people just go "its too hokey" I think this will cast it in a much less hokey light.
As far as the sex goes. Lets not forget how scantily clad the women were in the original series... if thats not sexual in nature, i don't know what is.
it was Nick Meyers (director of movies of 2 and 6) who said two great nuggets of wisdom: (1) Every piece of art is a result of the time in which it was made. We're never going to have a recreation of the original series, its never going to happen. Even New Frontiers is very different, despite all the visuals being very similar. Its a result of the fact that its modern. Lets take joy in that and see it unfold.
The other nugget of wisdom he mentioned was something from Doyle regarding sherlock. Doyle wasn't all that consistant - he had continuity errors all about, and he just ignored them - its not important. Don't let accuracy get in the way of a good story. In this context: Don't analyze it to death as far as its accuracy to established trek get in the way of it being a good story.
If its a bad story and innacurate, I'll be the first one to go "well that was crap" if its a good story and disposes some canon? I'm fine with that.