It's because you're insane man, we gotta get you a straight jacket sometime.
The 9th fleet tried that practically the same day I joined. Didn't work. Now, I have the entire South Wing of our headquarters all to myself, and there are signs posted that pretty much state, ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Luckily for me, I found all the signs and added the phrase, BRING CHINESE FOOD.