Topic: Men DO Remember Anniversaries

[Brush Wolf]

Men DO Remember Anniversaries


A woman awakes during the night to find that her
Husband is not in their bed. She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to
Look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a hot
Cup of coffee in front of him. He appears to be in deep thought, just
Staring at the wall. She watches as he wiped a tear from  his eye and takes a sip of his coffee. What's the matter, dear?" she whispers as she steps into the room, "Why are you down here at this time of night?"
The husband looks up from his coffee, "Do  you remember 20 years ago when
We were dating, and you were only 16?" he asks solemnly. The wife is
Touched to tears thinking  that her husband is so caring and sensitive.
"Yes, I do" she replies.  The husband paused. The words were not coming
Easily. "Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my
Car?" "Yes, I remember" said the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him. The husband continued. "Do you remember when he shoved the
Shotgun in my face and said, either you marry my daughter, or I will send
You to jail for 20 years?" "I remember that too" she replied softly. He wiped another tear from his cheek and said......

"I would have gotten out today."

[Sirgod]

LOL, I had forgotten this joke, but still funny as heck.

Stephen

[Centurus]

Thing is, he probably would have only gotten 10 years.  :-p

[Fedman NCC-3758]

A man makes a call and a little girl answers. "Hello?" inquires the girl.

"Hi honey, it's daddy." Is mommy near the phone?"

"No, she's upstairs." answers the girl.

"Do me a favor hun and call to her for me." " It's rather important."

"OK but it might get me in trouble." says the girl.

"Why's that hun?"  "Mom's sleeping?" asks the man.

No, she went to the bedroom with Uncle Frank and told me not to disturb them." said the girl.

"HUH?!"  "But you have no Uncle Frank honey." said the man.

"Yes I do."   "And he's in the bedroom with mommy." insisted the girl.

Controlling his rage, the man instructs the girl.  "Honey, listen carefully." "Call up to mommy and tell her you
see Daddy's car pulling onto the drive, OK?

"OK daddy."

The man hears the girl call up to her mother and hears something of a comotion.

"Honey!?"  "What's happening?"  "What's that noise?"

The girl replies, "I did as you asked and mom let out a scream!" "Then she and Uncle Frank ran out with nothing on!"

"Mommy ran to the stairs, slipped on the top step and fell all the way down!"

"And Uncle Frank?" asked the man.

"He ran to the back bedroom and jumped out the window toward the pool but forgot we drained it last weekend!" cried the girl.

"Huh!?"  "But we don't have a pool honey!" said the dumbfounded man.

"Sure we do daddy" insisted the girl.

After a pause the man asks, "Is this 555-2841?"

[Ferretlxix_XC]

Man this is soooo mean with mine just around the corner on the 15th.

[Sirgod]

Man this is soooo mean with mine just around the corner on the 15th.

LOL , Well this ones for you Steve, since I know you all have been apart for some time...

The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman. And was somewhat upset.

"You are a disrespectful pig!" She cried. "How dare you do this to me, a faithful wife, and the mother of your children? I'm leaving you. I want a divorce straight away!"

And Paddy (for it was he) replied "Hang on just a minute luv, so at least I can tell you what happened."

"Fine, go ahead", she sobbed," but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!"

And Paddy began - "Well, I was getting into the car to drive home and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days! So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments.

Since she needed a good clean-up I suggested a shower and while she was doing that I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I threw them away. Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't use because you say they are too tight. I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't use because I don't have good taste.

I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't use just to annoy her and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don't use because someone at work has a pair the same."

Here Paddy took a quick breath and continued - "She was so grateful for my understanding and help and as I walked her to the door she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said, "Please......... do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?

Give my love to your family and the kids bro.

Stephen

[Capt. Mike]

Ya see, with a little planning, anniversaries work out just fine...Deb and I got married on June 14th, 1975...well I picked Flag Day, so I'd remember...


Mike

[Ferretlxix_XC]

LOL, mine is on a pay day so, I have no excuse for not having a present

[AlienLXIX]

Ok yes the pay day was one of the reason that we picked that day but mostly it was a weekend that he could get leave from the IC School up in Great Lakes. 

Gosh we got over a bunch of obstacles just to be together and for you I would do it all over again.  Can't wait to see you soon honey.  And like I told you before I don't want a birthday or anniversary present unless its you dressed in nothing but a big red bow!