Dear Mum:
Arrrrrr!!!!!! 'Tis been a pleasant cruise up 'til now. The captain gives us plenty of grog (for medicinal purposes, of course) and I haven't had to face the lash more than once a week. Please find enclosed 10,000 gold doubloons, and buy yerself something nice.
Here's a few shots I thought you might like. It shows what a nice lot we all our, out here ....... ummmm.... directing traffic.
Arrrr!!! Seems to me that those landlubber merchants are always dropping things. Soon as we start closing in on 'em they start pitching stuff overbaord. The captain says its so they can get where they're going faster. Well, we pick their stuff up and keep it "safe" for them 'till they come back to claim it.
Then there are the accidents. A lot of people seem to get stranded out here when their ship <ahem> "breaks down".. Well, we can always pick up the strays, and for a small fee we
ransom take them back to their loved ones. There's no need to thank us, that's just part of our service.
Well, I'm running scarce on space here, Mum, so I best be signing off. Arrrr! Hugs and kisses. (But dont' hug too hard, my new hook is a little sharp.) My love to Sis, and tell Dad -- if you can find him -- that I said he could rot in Davey Jone's locker. Arrrrrr!
-Black Bart