Topic: The Lyran French Connection part II

[KAT Chuut-Ritt]

Something else that is interesting.  Was the Lyran Logo based on a French Design?




 

[KAT Chuut-Ritt]

Additionally:

http://www.napoleoncats.com/welcome.htm

Basically, the Napoleon Cat is a hybrid (a breed developed from a deliberate cross between two existing breeds) with its "parent" breeds being members of the Persian Group (Persians, Himalayans or Exotics) and the Munchkin Group (either long or short-haired Munchkins). From its Persian parent Group the Napoleon has acquired its boning, round face and eyes with an abundant and colorful coat. From its Munchkin parent Group, the Napoleon has acquired its distinctive short legs, the result of a naturally occurring spontaneous mutation known as hypochondroplasia, commonly called dwarfism.

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What would one of these "Napolean cats" look like you ask?  Well it so happens that Snickers Inc. operatives have managed to "procure" a portrait of one right from the Lyran Imperial Palace where they are strewn about the place like wallpaper. 

[Mutilator]

Always missing the best parts of our culture...maids we got french maids!!

[KAT Chuut-Ritt]

Always missing the best parts of our culture...maids we got french maids!!

So do we, they are usually called P.O.W. s however.   

[Mutilator]

Well based on what yours look like I guess it is easy to understand why you warmongering Kzints want ours. 

[KAT Chuut-Ritt]

Well based on what yours look like I guess it is easy to understand why you warmongering Kzints want ours. 

Don't try to foist your sister off on me 

P.S.  That one ugly dog 

[KAT Chuut-Ritt]

We use the Lyrans for the domestic duties the Kzin females are reserved for more important tasks:

Keeping the slaves in line:



So that the slaves serve us properly



Culling the cubs so that only the strong and intelligent survive



Teaching the survivors how to attend to their fathers properly



And personally providing relaxing diversions to their mates whether it be

At Home just "stretching the muscles"



On our starships with a little "Conquest of the Federation" kinky roleplay.



Or out in the wilds of the Homeworld for a bit of "How do you find Kzinerette in the Tall Grass?......Pretty Darn Good!"




 

[Matsukasi]

Surrender now, Lyrans.

Not only is it the French way, but let's face it....

... nobody beats Chuut in a picture battle. 

[Mutilator]

Surrender now, Lyrans.

Not only is it the French way, but let's face it....

... nobody beats Chuut in a picture battle. 

Never!



We Lyran have been spying on you a long time, right in your very own computers. Our agents have released the following to show there is nothing to fear from the Kzinti:


For years Kzintis have been over feeding on the fat of the universe, so much so, that most can no longer even stand up.


Those that do manage to get into a seated position are so tired by the time they get up


that their bodies go into shock and they often die


The Kziti that do manage to keep themselves in relatively good shape are nothing to fear either. We have dealt with all those we have caught. Most do beg for mercy but we will have none of it.


They all get the spin wash treatment to remove any tics and fleas they may carry.


We then interrogate them for any useful information. (Lyran agent masked for obvious reasons)


Once beaten shown the light of submission they tend to become useful Slaves employees of the Lyran Star Empire and carry out mundane remedial exciting new jobs careers to fill out their lives.


Those that some how manage to escape after capture, often grab old federation ground transports in quick desperation. We figure the Feds should have provided them with training or at least a manual as they tend to crash after a few kms.


In the end we Lyrans always have a few select agents that are well know for their love of hunting down Kzinti filth. Agents such as Likkerpig really enjoys this line of work especially when he is on the Nip.


So relax citizens of the Empire enjoy your lives as you should knowing you are well protected from the filth of the universe.


We always have super agents in reserve if any of the fat Kzinti allies decided to get involved.

[KAT Chuut-Ritt]

We then interrogate them for any useful information. (Lyran agent masked for obvious reasons)

OK, how much per hour will it cost me to be interrogated?   

[KAT Chuut-Ritt]

Fluf and Jinn prepare to drive Westwards into the heart of the Lyran empire



.......Meanwhile

Mutt wakes up in the morning and has the typical Lyran "Breakfast of Champions"



Then goes to report to "Baghdad Hexx" for his daily indoctrination training



We are winning the war, there are no Kzinti attacking Lyra, nor are they anywhere near to our planets.

.......

But  outside, the 17 th DF flotilla attack!   Captains Soreyes,, Krazy Kitty, and Dead Kitty provide a wakeup call for late sleeping and hung over inabitants of the Lyran captital



and Likkerpig is not happy to be awakened, "Here we go again, cursed droners!" he grumbles.



But he is a veteran and knows not to stay in bed during a Kzinti invasion, Trauma Tech isn't so wise and finds himself ambushed by Lyrkiller



And Maverick surprises Warp forcing him into a confinement cell



Before long Lyraa is once again conquered, and Jinn drops in getting fat off the opportunity....relly fat!



Hexx is given the Lyran crown and set up as a puppet ruler



But J'inn makes it clear to him who is relly in charge



And Chuut supplies his personal force of mercenaries with new coats



Courtesy of the new Lyran Prisoners



Matsukasi goes after a true prize,  Likkerpigs liquor cabinet



Yes life is good for a Kzin Chuut realizes, happier than he's been since he was a cub with his human "Nanny".

[Maverick]

All hail Chuut the picture war king =)

Nice to see you haven't lost your touch but please God don't put up that Song you took pictures from again or Mat will continue to torture me with it.

[KAT Chuut-Ritt]

but please God don't put up that Song you took pictures from again or Mat will continue to torture me with it.

Ummm Wrong song Maverick, heres the one that you meant, Mat's favorite 

http://www.rathergood.com/moon_song/

[Matsukasi]

YAY!!!!!!

< listens for screams of pain from the west coast >

[TraumaTech]

ahhhhhhhh Chuut.....silly little kzinti boy.We had to go way back into Lyran inteligence files .We found some old footage of you training .I guess this is why kzinti's are so one dimentional flying all those complicated drones 



http://www.extremely-sharp.com/direct/catvideo.html

[KAT Chuut-Ritt]

And we have files of you during an emergency response to a Kzinti attack drill

http://home.comcast.net/~morebigcat/AFH-cat-runs-into-wall.mpeg

P.S.  Aim for the window next time 

[Mutilator]

Mutt wakes up in the morning and has the typical Lyran "Breakfast of Champions"

After such a fulfilling breakfast I usually wash it down with something Dizzy gave me, care to join me Chuut? 

 

After that we could have a few cold beers and listen to your favorite Kziti band:

http://www.rathergood.com/independent_woman/

or perhaps my favorite Lyran rockers:

http://www.eyeenvision.com/litterbox/markedterritory.html

[Maverick]

but please God don't put up that Song you took pictures from again or Mat will continue to torture me with it.

Ummm Wrong song Maverick, heres the one that you meant, Mat's favorite 

http://www.rathergood.com/moon_song/

*screams* Oh God no *screams* There it is again! *screams*

I'm afraid very afraid *screams*

[KAT Chuut-Ritt]

After that we could have a few cold beers and listen to your favorite Kziti band:

http://www.rathergood.com/independent_woman/

or perhaps my favorite Lyran rockers:

http://www.eyeenvision.com/litterbox/markedterritory.html

The kzinti are fine, good mastery of the instruments the Lyran ones ...wel they just suck.

[Soreyes]

We Seemed to have found Hexx in his new Base Station