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Topic: Cold Appraisal  (Read 4056 times)

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Offline Commander La'ra

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Cold Appraisal
« on: November 20, 2005, 11:06:27 pm »
And here comes the latest Master Slask/Padawan Sune vignette.

Enjoy!


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Cold Appraisal



There was a slight chill in the afternoon air.

"He is a great fighter."  Master Slask hissed.

"I know that, Master."  His student responded.  Both sat upon the picnic table where they'd taken meals throughout the summer.  They'd have to do that indoors, soon.

Slask regarded his student.  Over many years he'd learned to read human expressions.  Slumped shoulders, downcast eyes, the resting of elbows on knees...he knew what they meant.  He also knew that, right now, he should say nothing more.

The wind whistled through the clearing.  It tugged at Marissa's hair.

"The second time, he let me use the Force."  She informed, finally.

"I see."  He said.  The man he'd chosen to teach Marissa to fight with her hands was an exacting instructor.  Initially, Slask's padawan had taken to the lessons with typical enthusiasm.  There'd been a tension growing of late, however, between the Jedi student and the burly human warrior.  The tension had finally released.  Marissa had bruises.

"I should have beat him, then."  She said.

"Why?"  Slask asked.

Marissa's eyes studied the picnic table.  Normally, Slask did his best to condition her to meet the eyes of her challenger.  Right now he was not her challenger.

It was some time before she spoke.

"I had the Force.  I could...see what he was about to do.  Feel it.  But it didn't matter."

Slask scratched his knuckles and waited.

"It shouldn't have mattered how fast he was."  Marissa continued.  "I should've been able to block him, I should've been able to see what he was about to do and stop him."

Slask nodded.

"He was stronger and faster.  He beat me.  That isn't supposed to happen."

"Because he is not a Jedi."

"Yes."  She declared.  She wiped something out of her eye.  "Because he's not a Jedi."

The wind calmed for a moment, picked up again.  A bird call echoed from up the hill.

"Jedi aren't supposed to think that way."  She said.  "I'm not supposed to feel that way.  I'm not supposed to think I'm better than him."

"Why?"

"All are one with the Force.  I hear it more clearly than many people, but that doesn't make me better."

"There are many Jedi who feel as you do."  Slask responded.  His thoughts drifted for but a moment.  His mind recalled incidents of haughty arrogance, even complacency, displayed by creatures in the robes of the Order.

"I don't want to feel that way."  Marissa declared.  "But I do."

"Changing your own perceptions is a challenge."

Marissa sniffed. Tears were running down both cheeks now, though she did not sob.

"Master..."

"...you wish to be alone."

Marissa nodded.

"I will still be here when you return."  He advised as warmly as his reptillian tounge would allow.

His padawan rose without another word, stuffed her hands in her jacket pockets, and walked off into the woods.

Slask watched her go.  There was sympathy in his heart.

Curiously, there was also pride.



End
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"Dialogue from a play, Hamlet to Horatio: 'There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.' Dialogue from a play written long before men took to the sky. There are more things in heaven and earth, and in the sky, than perhaps can be dreamt of. And somewhere in between heaven, the sky, the earth, lies the Twilight Zone."
                                                                 ---------Rod Serling, The Last Flight

Offline Grim Reaper

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Re: Cold Appraisal
« Reply #1 on: November 22, 2005, 04:58:30 am »
allow me to be equally short:

Quote
"Changing your own perceptions is a challenge."

And for many a challenge to great.
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Snickers@DND: If there is one straight answer in that bent little head of yours, you'd better start spillin' it pretty damn quick, or I'm gonna take a large, blunt object, roughly the size of Kallae AND his hat and shove it lengthwise up a crevice of your being so seldomly cleaned that even the denizens of the nine hells would not touch it with a 10-feet rusty pole

Offline CaptJosh

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Re: Cold Appraisal
« Reply #2 on: November 22, 2005, 11:41:43 am »
to great what? </teasing>

Seriously though, you're right in what you mean, even if your spelling was inaccurate. CHanging perceptions is too great a challenge for far too many people.
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CaptJosh

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Offline Scottish Andy

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Re: Cold Appraisal
« Reply #3 on: November 27, 2005, 03:45:54 pm »
I really like this little piece. It's quintessential human nature at it's purest.

The very fact that she realises she shouldn't--and doesn't want to--feel that way means she's a large jump ahead of most.

Others either don't realise they shouldn't, or worst of all completely give in to the feeling and enjoy their supposed superiority.

Keep 'em coming Larry.

PS. Josh, please lay off the nitpicking. It gets really irritating.
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Offline CaptJosh

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Re: Cold Appraisal
« Reply #4 on: November 27, 2005, 09:19:52 pm »
Um, that was teasing, that time. Note the smiley, please. It was just too good an opening for this smartass Kzin to pass up. :D
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CaptJosh

There are only 10 kinds of people in the world;
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Offline KOTH-KieranXC, Ret.

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Re: Cold Appraisal
« Reply #5 on: December 05, 2005, 06:43:49 pm »
I really like these little SW vignettes you do, La'ra, even if this IS a ST forum and they take time away from your Klink stories. ;)

They're not your usual story though, and I like that. It's not every day where you read a SW story that doesn't make anyone with any Force talent whatsoever an unstoppable warrior.
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Offline Commander La'ra

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Re: Cold Appraisal
« Reply #6 on: December 05, 2005, 07:06:00 pm »
Quote
It's not every day where you read a SW story that doesn't make anyone with any Force talent whatsoever an unstoppable warrior.

Yeah.  As Jaeih said in another thread, there's an epidemic of unstoppable Jedi in many novels and fan stories, yet in the movies, while definitely formidable, they still die just like anyone else.

I haven't got to any real action sequences yet, but I'm hoping that, when I do, I can convey their abilities without making them seem invulnerable.

Wish me luck. ;D
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"Dialogue from a play, Hamlet to Horatio: 'There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.' Dialogue from a play written long before men took to the sky. There are more things in heaven and earth, and in the sky, than perhaps can be dreamt of. And somewhere in between heaven, the sky, the earth, lies the Twilight Zone."
                                                                 ---------Rod Serling, The Last Flight

Offline Grim Reaper

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Re: Cold Appraisal
« Reply #7 on: December 06, 2005, 03:18:51 am »
good luck
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Snickers@DND: If there is one straight answer in that bent little head of yours, you'd better start spillin' it pretty damn quick, or I'm gonna take a large, blunt object, roughly the size of Kallae AND his hat and shove it lengthwise up a crevice of your being so seldomly cleaned that even the denizens of the nine hells would not touch it with a 10-feet rusty pole

Offline Jaeih t`Radaik

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Re: Cold Appraisal
« Reply #8 on: December 06, 2005, 01:41:41 pm »
I'm confused, La'ra.

Now, I know I said that I hate the "undefeatable Jedi" stories, but itwas along a different line. I think i was Praxis' stories that had a Jedi defeat hundreds of crew/soldiers/whatever with ease.

As for fighting a single opponent, especially one who does not use the force, I do expect them to win, and that the only way to defeat them is an ambush, trap, or carefully orchestrated attack, all by superior forces.

I have to admit to siding wih Marisa here. I don't understand, myself, how she was beaten if she can use the force to know what he's doing ahead of time and knows how to counter it.

Or is that it? She knows what he's going to do, but is not trained enough (combat-wise) to block or dodge it?

I'm afraid this piece doesn't work for me as I don't understand why she lost, and you don't explain it clearly enough for me to figure it out.

Hints, anyone? Am I just thick, or what?
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Offline Commander La'ra

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Re: Cold Appraisal
« Reply #9 on: December 07, 2005, 02:01:16 pm »
Quote
I have to admit to siding wih Marisa here. I don't understand, myself, how she was beaten if she can use the force to know what he's doing ahead of time and knows how to counter it.

Simply put, she has yet to reach the level of physical skill that would allow her to deflect every attack she sees is going to come at her.  Sure, she knows a punch or a kick or a grab is coming, but is she fast enough to avoid it, strong enough to block it, or skilled enough to know HOW to do either?

She's not completely untrained, but, as this vignette shows, she's not yet up to the level of her instructor.
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"Dialogue from a play, Hamlet to Horatio: 'There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.' Dialogue from a play written long before men took to the sky. There are more things in heaven and earth, and in the sky, than perhaps can be dreamt of. And somewhere in between heaven, the sky, the earth, lies the Twilight Zone."
                                                                 ---------Rod Serling, The Last Flight

Offline CaptJosh

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Re: Cold Appraisal
« Reply #10 on: December 07, 2005, 03:55:07 pm »
That was the way I read it. Basically, her Master used this teacher who doesn't use the force as a way of saying, "Don't get cocky, kid. You've got a lot to learn, yet."
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CaptJosh

There are only 10 kinds of people in the world;
those who understand binary and those who don't.

Offline Jaeih t`Radaik

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Re: Cold Appraisal
« Reply #11 on: December 08, 2005, 06:06:41 am »
Ahhh... so I was right in my assumption then. Not often that happens. Make a note in the log...  ;D
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"I'm just observing. You know, making observations."
"Great. We'll stick a telescope in your head and put a dome over it, and we can call you an observatory."
Paris and Rory, from "The Gilmore Girls."

Offline Commander La'ra

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Re: Cold Appraisal
« Reply #12 on: February 19, 2006, 04:03:05 pm »
Bumping this one since it's directly connected to the new vignette I'm posting.
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"Dialogue from a play, Hamlet to Horatio: 'There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.' Dialogue from a play written long before men took to the sky. There are more things in heaven and earth, and in the sky, than perhaps can be dreamt of. And somewhere in between heaven, the sky, the earth, lies the Twilight Zone."
                                                                 ---------Rod Serling, The Last Flight

Offline Commander La'ra

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Re: Cold Appraisal
« Reply #13 on: November 06, 2006, 02:09:14 am »
Get back up to the top, there!
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"Dialogue from a play, Hamlet to Horatio: 'There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.' Dialogue from a play written long before men took to the sky. There are more things in heaven and earth, and in the sky, than perhaps can be dreamt of. And somewhere in between heaven, the sky, the earth, lies the Twilight Zone."
                                                                 ---------Rod Serling, The Last Flight
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