Topic: GW5 Fiction - Warned Ya - Um, not for the weak of heart...  (Read 1901 times)

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Offline TheJudge

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GW5 Fiction - Warned Ya - Um, not for the weak of heart...
« on: March 20, 2005, 06:47:39 pm »
“Captain, we have a Priority-One subspace call for you.” The voice of the duty communications officer woke me up and I let out a groan.  I hated these calls, but they were a part of being in Starfleet.  Before keying the comm. panel next to the bed I poked the warm body lying next to me.

“You better get back to your cabin, Larry.” I said softly.  The brown-haired young man sat up sleepily, stretching to show off his body.

“I’m Jerry.” He reminded me with a hint of exasperation before leaning over and picking up his blue uniform shorts.  I let out a sigh and shrugged.

“Sorry.” I said while he pulled on the blue shorts, blue socks, and black boots that were his uniform.  I kept on forgetting which brother was which until they put on their uniform shorts.  Larry wore blue and was a nurse in Sickbay.  His brother Gary wore gold and was my best helmsman while their other brother Jerry wore the red of security. After his delightful butt had scurried out of my cabin I keyed the comm. and told the bridge to send the signal to my views screen.  Moments later, the haggard face of Admiral Larson appeared.  He frowned as always when he saw I was wearing nothing but my gold command shorts.  Like most of Starfleet, he didn’t approve of my modified uniform.

“Captain, what took so long?” Larson demanded.

“Had to get dressed, Admiral.” I answered with a noncommittal shrug of my shoulders.  Let him dare to make a comment about how long it took to put a pair of shorts on.

“Well, Starfleet has a special mission for you.” He stated with a disapproving frown.  This was interesting.  They’d stuck me out here on the border to hunt down Orion pirates engaged in selling green slave women, mostly because they were pretty sure I wouldn’t be tempted by sampling the wares.  Now they had another special mission?

“I can’t wait.” I replied when he’d paused after his announcement.  For some reason his frown deepened.

“Have you heard about Queen Kroma?” Larson asked and this time I groaned loudly.

“Oh dear, please tell me this mission has nothing to do with drag queens.” I moaned while putting my face in my hands.  “You know what happens when I get around drag queens.  The results aren’t pretty.”

“You’ll be on your best behavior, Captain.” Larson said with firmness that brooked no argument from me.  “The Queen has heard of your ship and wants you assigned to help the Gorn.  They’re having some problems and the Federation may end up getting dragged into things.  You will help in any way you can.  Turn your ship around and head for the Gorn border.”

“Will do, Admiral.” I said before cutting off the commlink and leaning back in my chair to contemplate the misery ahead of me.

“Captain, we have a ship on sensors that matches the records of that slave trader.” The comms officer said over the comm. link.  Now this was more like it!

“Take us to Red Alert and set an intercept course.” I ordered into the speaker automatically.  “I’ll be on the bridge shortly.”

“Aye aye, sir.” 

The ship was small, which was a good thing because the trip to the bridge didn’t take long.  The bridge was also small, but I had to smile at the sight of my crew going about their business efficiently.  Their bodies were the epitome of fitness, and their smiles at seeing me were always reassuring.  Sure, we had a lot of fun, but when it came to business, they were the best.

“Status report.” I ordered as I sat down in my command chair.  It was still warm from Benji sitting in it.  My blond-haired exec was at his tactical station and nodded in my direction at the request.

“We’re at Warp Six in pursuit.” Benji answered.  “It’ll take us another two minutes to get into weapons range.  So far they’re ignoring our hails.  The ship is definitely the one we’ve been looking for.” 

“Excellent.” I said with a nod. 

“Sir, we’re ready for action.” Kevin, the duty engineering officer stated from his console.  I just nodded at the report while staring at the main screen which currently showed a tactical graphic of our pursuit course.

“Hail them again, John.” I told the red-clad communications officer.  He turned back to his console and issued another demand for the target vessel to heave to and prepare for inspection. 

“No response sir.” John stated calmly after a minute had gone by.

“We’re in weapons range now sir.” Benji stated.

“Load a torpedo, half-power and fire across their bow.” I ordered.  Lin, the bronze-skinned Chinese navigator had the intelligence to switch the main viewer to a forward visual feed. I always liked the sight of magic photons streaking towards a target.  This one sailed perfectly in front of the bow of the target vessel.

“They’re slowing down, sir.” Benji stated a moment later.

“Match course change and speed, keep forward arcs ready.” I ordered.  “Load torpedo bays with full warshots.”

“Done, sir.” Benji ordered.

“We’re being hailed, sir.” John said calmly.

“On screen.” I ordered.  The main viewscreen now showed a typical Orion male.

“What is Starfleet doing firing on my vessel?” He demanded angrily.

“Next time stop when I tell you to or we’ll just go ahead and target your engines.” I said firmly with a hint of anger.  “You know very well why we’re stopping you.  Prepare for an inspection crew.”

“Captain, we can discuss this like civilized man.” The Orion said defensively.  “Come, we can reach an agreement.  I have women that will take you to levels of pleasure as you’ve never experienced before!”

My bridge crew broke in laughter at the offer of the Orion who looked confused while my crew and I laughed so hard that I thought my stomach was going to twist apart.  It must have taken a good minute for all of us to get ourselves back under control.  Really, this guy must be new.

“Perhaps I should introduce myself.” I said with a smile.  “I’m known as the Judge, commander of the USS Adjudicator.”

“Oh, I see.” The pirate said with a frown.  “Um, my cousin has some handsome young men…”

“That won’t help too much either.” I said with a frown.  “Prepare to be boarded.”

“See you soon.” The pirate said with a defeated scowl.  I was a little disappointed.  A good fight would have been welcome right now.  The thought of dealing with a drag queen again had me shuddering in my command seat.  Oh well, I still had a ship to board, slave women to free, and a pirate to put in prison.

“John, inform security to begin boarding operations.” I ordered as I relaxed back into my chair.

Queen Kroma would just have to wait for a few hours.


*****


Okay, see what happens when I'm bored? 
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Offline Dfly

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Re: GW5 Fiction - Warned Ya - Um, not for the weak of heart...
« Reply #1 on: March 20, 2005, 08:26:35 pm »
nicely done,

Offline Green

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Re: GW5 Fiction - Warned Ya - Um, not for the weak of heart...
« Reply #2 on: March 21, 2005, 08:02:22 pm »
::On Board the GCS Render...formally the MVS Render...<God ... I hate Kroma>...::

Klas:  Captain, we have intercepted the NCC Boy's Town and ...

Green:  Damnit Klas.  I've told you, I'm a Colonel, now get it right!

Klas:  <giving a sigh of indifference> Uh, yes Cap...I mean Colonel.  Anyway sire we have intercepted the ship and are preparing to receive new crewmembers.

Green:  Excellent.  A new batch of blood-thirsty Federation warriors will indeed be a welcomed sight.  These sorry-assed lizards just aren't quick enough.  And please ... let's not even talk about how slow they turn.  Sheesh.

<A couple of Gorn crewmembers turn to each other and whisper>
S'Tupid1:  Did you tell that idiot we don't have dronessssss?
S'Tupid2:  Nah...letssssss let that bafoon find out in battle.  Oh, and I call dibssss on essscape pod 3>

Klas:  Yes, well, the new crewmembers will be transported to bay 2. 

Green:  Excellent.  I'll go welcome our latest group of killers.

Klas:  Colonel, there is something you should know.  The new ...

Green:  Not now you idiot.  I have to meet the new men ... you have the bridge.

::Transport Room 2::

Green:  Alright crewman, bring the men aboard.

Crewman12, playing a bit part:  But sire, there is something you should know.  The bio signs show that the new transfers are actually...

Green:  Shut up already and beam 'em over.  If you say one more word I'll have to pay you scale and I just don't have the budget. 

<Crewman12 moves the little slidey thingies up and down and six humans appear on the transport deck.  All between 5'2" and 5'10", all less then 125 pounds, all with big pointy things, all stunningly beautiful females...and born that way!!!>

New Crewwoman1:  Giggle.

New Crewwoman2:  Wow.  Like the last time I saw something like that was like when I was like at band camp and this guy brought a...

New Crewwoman3:  Ohhh...don't you go there again girlfriend.

New Crewwomen 4-6:  Where's the jello tub?

Green:  <smiles>  Thank you Judge ...

Offline TheJudge

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Re: GW5 Fiction - Warned Ya - Um, not for the weak of heart...
« Reply #3 on: March 21, 2005, 08:58:20 pm »
Hehehehehehe

I couldn't have any females on my ship, ya know.  :)


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Offline Julin Eurthyr

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Re: GW5 Fiction - Warned Ya - Um, not for the weak of heart...
« Reply #4 on: March 21, 2005, 10:29:22 pm »
Deep in Romulan space, 3 kilometers from the Galactic Border, is the strangest posting ever conceived.
At these undisclosed coordinates exists a mobile base.  This station is not much more than a framework with a couple of weapons and sensors, just enough living space to support the crew, and an area to maintain their "Freight Eagle".
The existance of the personnel at this base is monotonous.  They have nothing but empty space and the Galactic Barrier to look at.  Their only contact with the outside world comes monthly, when a standard Freight Eagle drops a pallet off just within a light year of the station, and sends an uncoded "ping" transmission to notify their drop.  They then go on a nearly week-long trip with their "sublight" Freight Eagle to pick up their supplies, where they return to wait 3 weeks for the next ping.
The weapons have not been fired at a target since they were tested at the weaponer's test range, as this base cannot even afford to waste the material that makes up the cargo container.
The crew makes the best of this posting, as all aboard the station know that every crewmember was deemed "too important to kill" yet "too undependable to keep in the Empire".  All of them can tell, in graphic detail, the cause that brought each and every crewmember to this station, as after they use up their monthly allotment of entertainment materials, there is little else to do on a drunken night, or sober duty shift.
At the head of this operation is, obviously enough, the Empire's #1 man who is both "too important to kill" yet "too undependable to keep around".  This officer is the only one to have received a promotion preceding his assignment here...


Commander S'Leth awakens from his nap at the command station, to see the usual array of steady green lights.  Having worked out enough for the next 2 days, S'Leth realizes he has little else to do for "official duties" till the next freight drop in a week and a half.  So, he does what he's done about 10,000 times before, he picks up his data pad and proceeds to perform yet another "unannounced" inspection of the station.
He begins the inspection as usual, checking in with the crewpeople making up his bridge crew.  Many of the officers stationed on the bridge were young promising officers who learned a lot, and in many cases learned one thing too many that made their existance in the Empire a threat.  The Comm officer is, as everything typically seems to have, the exception.  He was an older officer, a career diplomat, who was sent here when they couldn't keep him contained in the bowels of the Imperial Senate.  As was typical during these inspections, S'Leth would render a salute to him to signify "all well at your post", after which S'Leth proceeded to the turbolift, to continue his inspection.

This time, all were shocked when, just after S'Leth finished the salute and turned to the turbolift, a red light started blinking and a tone sounded throughout the bridge.
The Comm Officer took one look at the panel, and wheezed out "Priority Communication from the Praetor's office" with his dying breath, as the shock of the sudden tone and recognition of the light's pattern led to a heart attack in the elderly officer.
S'Leth, long versed in priority communications from his days in the Diplomatic Service, takes over and decodes the transmission.  The length of the transmission disappointed him, for it seemed no larger than the "transmissions" of static frequently misinterpreted by the older equipment as coded data, but was really just a lucky pattern of static from the barrier.  However, his disappointment quickly turned to a dull shock when, after using his old code information, he realized that this was not barrier-static, but an actual message, destined primarily for him, the text of which was short, but would prove sweet to the crew.

S'Leth quickly printed this data, and used the internal comm equipment to call "all hands", even those on duty posts, to the auditorium for reception of the Praetoral message.

10 minutes later, except for the officers manning the engineering posts that could not be abandoned without shutting down the station, all hands were arrayed in perfect parade order awaiting S'Leth's proclimation.  S'Leth stepped up to the podium, pulled out the printout, and spoke into the microphone, "All hands, per the Praetor's orders, we are going to receive a ship in 2 days, it is expected to be one of the new Firehawks on a "test trial".  This vessel can brave the barrier's power, and shall dock directly to this station in order to pick up all hands and oversee the deactivation of this post during the anticipated crisis.  We are to be ready for this event, as we shall be given no longer than 3 hours to shut down this station and board the vessel.  Our presence is deemed important by the Praetor, and we are expected to serve.  Long live the Praetor."
S'Leth doesn't even survey the crew, having already turned his back to them and reached the door before the crew finished their salutes and cries of "long live the Praetor" still echo throughout the walls of the auditorium.  At that moment, it was more important for S'Leth to honor his dead crewman than oversee the choreographed movements of the live.  S'Leth had less than 3 days to properly honor the commander of the vessel that introduced S'Leth to the ISC, and he intended to make sure that the person would receive full honors...

AKA: Koloth Kinshaya - Lord of the House Kinshaya in the Klingon Empire
S'Leth - Romulan Admiral
Some anonymous strongman in Prime Industries

Offline TheJudge

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Re: GW5 Fiction - Warned Ya - Um, not for the weak of heart...
« Reply #5 on: March 24, 2005, 12:49:33 pm »
“Congratulations, Captain, you’ve been appointed the personal secretary of Queen Kroma.” Admiral Cheeser stated with a suppressed chortle that set my teeth on edge almost as much as his announcement.


“No!” I shouted aloud.  “This cannot be happening!  Do you know what personal secretaries do for drag queens?  We fetch their bra inserts, get them a fresh pair of panty hose, and their Zima with a shot of cranberry!  That’s…that’s…despicable!  Besides, what will my crew think?  Here’s their hunky captain running around as errand boy for a flaming queen!”

“Your crew will adjust.” Cheeser stated with suppressed mirth. “After all, they eventually adjusted to their new uniforms.”

“The damn problem isn’t the uniforms, it’s just keeping them IN uniform while on duty.” I groaned aloud. 

“Yes, yes, well, it’s time for you to head into Gorn space to assume your new duties.” Cheeser ordered.  I snapped to attention before leaving his office.  His parting words made me wince, though.

“Oh, the Queen is sending a ship to escort you.” Cheeser told me.  “The GCS Manhole Primed will be meeting you just across the border.  I hear their Captain has a special welcoming dinner planned for you.”

“I’ll get you for this Admiral.” I stated under my breath before leaving the office.  Well, I’d be sure not to take Larry, Jerry, or Gary with me to the gorn ship for dinner. 
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Offline Capt Jeff

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Re: GW5 Fiction - Warned Ya - Um, not for the weak of heart...
« Reply #6 on: March 25, 2005, 05:37:55 am »
LOL, I was flying the GCS "Manhole Primed"  (MCC) yesterday......on the test server.

Did they let you name the ships?     :o
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Offline TheJudge

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Re: GW5 Fiction - Warned Ya - Um, not for the weak of heart...
« Reply #7 on: March 25, 2005, 12:04:46 pm »
No, Kroma did that all by his lonesome.  They won't even give me the USS Bois Town.


Edit:  I would like the USS BENDOVER though.  :)

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Offline Kroma BaSyl

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Re: GW5 Fiction - Warned Ya - Um, not for the weak of heart...
« Reply #8 on: March 25, 2005, 12:16:19 pm »



Edit:  I would like the USS BENDOVER though.  :)



The GCS Bendover has been in service for years. Piloted by GDA Doctor Proctor. Although, somehow that's not what I think you had in mind.
♥ ♥ ♥  GDA Kroma BaSyl  ♥ ♥ ♥
GCS Prima Ballerina
GCS PHAT Gorn
GCS Queen Kroma


Because this game makes me feel like  a thirteen year old girl trapped in a lizards body.

Offline TheJudge

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Re: GW5 Fiction - Warned Ya - Um, not for the weak of heart...
« Reply #9 on: March 25, 2005, 12:32:58 pm »
I want a fed ship with that name.  *sigh*


Oh, and um, I'd like the USS Longtool as well.

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Offline Kroma BaSyl

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Re: GW5 Fiction - Warned Ya - Um, not for the weak of heart...
« Reply #10 on: March 25, 2005, 12:49:03 pm »

Oh, and um, I'd like the USS Longtool as well.



LOL...that is what 762 wished for Xmas as well. I have tried to tell him the peepee pumb  is a scam.
♥ ♥ ♥  GDA Kroma BaSyl  ♥ ♥ ♥
GCS Prima Ballerina
GCS PHAT Gorn
GCS Queen Kroma


Because this game makes me feel like  a thirteen year old girl trapped in a lizards body.

Offline TheJudge

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Re: GW5 Fiction - Warned Ya - Um, not for the weak of heart...
« Reply #11 on: March 25, 2005, 04:39:13 pm »
I never used the pump...but well I just find a long one somewhere around....
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