Topic: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.  (Read 5121 times)

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Offline Kroma BaSyl

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The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« on: February 25, 2005, 01:59:47 pm »
The Rise of the Matriarchy
♥ ♥ ♥ Long Live the Drag Queen!!! ♥ ♥ ♥


Kroma Basyl sat impatiently at the vanity in his luxurious suite overlooking the Royal Plaza of Ghdar City, while his handmaids (not a maiden among them) busily applied the final touches to his hair and makeup. The Royal Dressmaker, S’Trupaul, hovered over the ensemble making minor adjustments to Madam Kroma’s gown and using an electric cattle prod to motivate any handmaids or cabin boys that weren’t showing the proper urgency while attending to their new Matriarch. All this Royal protocol was new to Ghdar now that the Confederation had been officially dissolved, and S’Trupaul was going to make damn sure the Royal staff, courtiers and populace at large made the cultural transition before the Coronation as if her life depended on it, which it most certainly did.

Noticing her Mistresses ruminating expression and slight frown, S’Trupaul, quickly inquires, “Whatever is troubling you on this most magnificent of occasions Mistress?” Seeing Madam Kroma’s hesitation she quickly adds, “Oh I hope your not thinking about that two timing snake Admiral S’Cipio again!?!? You know you are better off without him.”

Sighing Kroma confides in his Royal Dressmaker, “It’s just that I wish I had someone to share this day of days with. It all seems so hollow without a hunky man lizard at my side”. <sigh>

Consoling her Mistress S’Trupaul says, “Oh dearie, we have been over this a hundred times. You are better off without him. I mean after all, if he were still on Ghdar this day may never have come. He was holding you back, as well as the Gorn people. He wore that god awful tunic for crying out loud, which really didn’t flatter those chicken legs.”

“Oh S’Trupaul, don’t you know that true love is blind, that’s why men feel around so much” reminded Kroma. “I know you are right, it’s just the way he left, with that Romulan tart no less, that has gotten me down. I think I will be taking your advice and drowning my sorrow’s in cabin boys after the ceremony”, as an impetuous smile crept across his face. “I don’t know how I would have got through this without you S’Trupaul, you are too good to me”.

Basking in the glow of her Matriarch, S’Trupaul hastily pokes a handmaid with the cattle prod for good measure, which causes the handmaid to let out a blood curdling shriek before he passed out. Giggling Kroma shoots S’Trupaul a conspiratorial smile as he motions for the Captain of the Guard Commander Kel to remove the unconscious handmaid to the Royal bedchamber, where Kroma would continue the disciplining of the handmaid after the Coronation was over.

Peeking out the drapery covering the entrance to the balcony which over looks the Plaza, S’Trupaul gleefully informs her Mistress of the size of the gathering crowd, “Oh my Mistress, it looks like all of Ghdar has shown up to witness and celebrate your Glorious Coronation”, in toned S’Trupaul acting surprised. She was in fact not surprised at all, as it was by her order that every male resident of Ghdar City was forcefully evicted from his sunning rock and made to gather in the Plaza for the Coronation ceremony, however, that was a little detail S’Trupaul thought better to keep to herself.

Jumping to his feet, and knocking handmaids and cabin boys left and right, Kroma not-so-gingerly runs to the balcony. Blowing past S’Trupaul Kroma throws open wide the drapery and walks out into plain view of the growing crowd. Noticing the crowd’s lack of enthusiastic response to his sudden appearance on the balcony, Kroma begins to frown and turn towards S’Trupaul. S’Trupaul to her credit immediately picks up on Kroma’s displeasure and quickly interjects, “Oh Mistress Kroma, you have to remember just how high up we are, just press that button on the rail to get their attention.”

Noticing the newly installed button on the railing for the first time, Kroma smashes down on it with a meaty paw. Instantly every single Gorn in the Plaza let’s out a sharp cry and falls to his knees in supplication as several hundred joules of plasma based electricity engulfs their testicles. Now fully recovered Kroma gleefully asks aloud, “S’Trupaul can you feel it?”

S’Trupaul blushing, “Oh Mistress you know I had those removed years ago.”

Turning to face S’Trupaul Kroma explains, “Not that silly, I mean the love of my people in the air, CAN YOU FEEL THAT?”

Hastily, “Why of course Mistress, I just didn’t notice as I have become so used to that feeling whenever you walk into the room”, thinking she better change the subject and fast the Dressmaker adds, “Did I mention that the hunky new Andorian Ambassador from the Federation will be joining us for the Coronation?”

Suddenly giddy with joy Kroma asks, “You didn’t already tell him I have agreed to enter their little war with the Romulans have you? I need my leverage, and that one seems a bit butch. I wouldn’t want him to realize I had already committed myself to improving the fashion sensibilities of the alpha quadrant, before I extracted my terms from him” <snickering>

“Of course not Mistress. In fact I have told him quiet the opposite, and insinuated to him that the best way to gain your support would be by appealing to your heart and loins”, giggling.

“Oh S’Trupaul, I may make you Prime Minister yet”, lavishes Kroma. At that, the scheming Dressmaker stifled a grin and kneels humbly, “Your wish is my command, Oh beautiful one. Now let’s get this show on the road”, turning to a handmaid S’Trupaul barks out, “Get the crown ready and show in our distinguished”, glancing to see if Kroma was listening, “and well hung guests from the Federation!”
« Last Edit: February 26, 2005, 09:40:26 am by Kroma »
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Because this game makes me feel like  a thirteen year old girl trapped in a lizards body.

Offline Kroma BaSyl

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #1 on: February 25, 2005, 02:16:15 pm »
Meanwhile out in the corridor leading from the Coronation suite to Madam Kroma’s bedchambers, Commander Kel was dragging a barely conscious handmaid towards a secrete passage way. Once inside the passage and away from prying eyes, Commander Kel vigorously shakes the stunned handmaid awake. “What is your name, and do you want live another day?”, as the handmaid who was of diminutive stature and feline decent slowly began to open his eyes Kel quickly repeated himself adding, “..look we haven’t much time and I need to know if you’re with me.”

Note quite sure, but realizing this may have been the break he had been waiting for the handmaid ventures, “Overload Hexx of the Lyran Empire and I haven’t been with anyone, thank you. I was captured and forced into bondage during the Slave Girls rebellion”.

“Overlord….Lyran…”, stammered Kel. Thinking quickly, Kel realizes this may be even better than he had hoped. “Well if you want to keep your chastity in check you better be with me. I have a BF waiting for you in spacedock, waiting to…”

Hexx whimpers, “I thought you said I could keep my chastity?”

Sighing at having to explain himself “I mean, I have a Fast Battlecuiser waiting to take you to a rendezvous in the Romulan neutral zone. You are to bring word to Admirals Scipio and Agave what has transpired here today in their absence. Someone needs to tell them what that narcissistic maniac and his deviant Dressmaker are up to before it is to late.”

“To late for what?”, asked Hexx.

“To late to regain my dignity and that of the entire Gorn populace if we are made to serve that nut job. I mean have you seen the new officers uniforms?”, shouted Kel horrified.

“OK, ok”, said Hexx, trying to calm the now hysterical Commander Kel. “Let’s get to that BF….errr….Fast Battlecruiser quickly.”
« Last Edit: February 25, 2005, 02:31:41 pm by Kroma »
♥ ♥ ♥  GDA Kroma BaSyl  ♥ ♥ ♥
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Because this game makes me feel like  a thirteen year old girl trapped in a lizards body.

Offline GDA-S'Cipio

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #2 on: February 25, 2005, 02:48:37 pm »
Long live Kel!  Hero of the Gorn people!

I'd give a toast in his honor, but I can't find the liquer cabinet in this damn Romulan ship.  I told them not to let that cloak affect any of my personal property before they figured out how to turn it off.

Bah!  amateurs.

-S'Cipio
"I cannot undertake to lay my finger on that article of the Constitution which granted a right to Congress of expending, on the objects of benevolence, the money of their constituents."  - James Madison (chief author of the Constitution)

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Offline Firehawk

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #3 on: February 25, 2005, 02:59:01 pm »

I'd give a toast in his honor, but I can't find the liquer cabinet in this damn Romulan ship.  I told them not to let that cloak affect any of my personal property before they figured out how to turn it off.

Bah!  amateurs.

-S'Cipio

Sorry S'Cipio but the liquer cabinet won't be installed until Tuesday  ;D
Firehawk of the Romulan SPQR

Offline GDA-Agave

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #4 on: February 25, 2005, 09:35:23 pm »
What's going on here!!

Well, it looks like it's time to put together the GLM, Gorn Liberation Movement.    We shall be successful.

Your days are numbered, Your Freakiness!!



Agave
Bruce with a purpose!!


(nice roleplaying thread, I'll contribute more later)
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Offline KOTH-KieranXC, Ret.

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #5 on: February 25, 2005, 10:05:54 pm »
Ooo. I think this is a good time for Kieran the Bruce to return. ;D

Will post more later.
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Offline Julin Eurthyr

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #6 on: February 26, 2005, 09:22:45 am »
Concordia Staff Offices:

Varkin walks into Julin's office and asks, "Julin, have you seen the recent broadcasts of the coronation going on right now on G'hdar?"
"No.  Read the reports from the Gorn Spying Division office," <click>, "learned all I needed," <click>, "from the reports." <click>
"2 questions.  Are you playing that 'pacify the Earth in World War II' game again, and why are they now the Gorn Spying Division?"
"Yes." <click> "Got Hearts of Iron II on again."  Varkin rolls his eyes.  <click> "And the term 'Gorn Intelligence' just completely disappeared with their recent governmental changes."
"That bad, huh?"  Varkin looks on now with shocked disbelief...
"Consider, S'Cipio is the truly smart one, he's joined the Romulan cause.  Agave is back to the Confederacy..."
"Confederacy?" Varkin inquires by way of interruption...
"Yes, Confederacy.  Considering that he's leading a rebellion, and not calling shots for the Confederation, I thought the term fit."
"Ahhh..."  Varkin nods.
"And look what's left in charge over there.  The diva of bad fashion 'herself'."
"So what will our response be?"
"None.  We need to rebuild after the Slave Girls affair.  I think that I need to call my buddy S'leth, and get him back into action.  He's already looking to get back into action to 'police' Hexx..."

AKA: Koloth Kinshaya - Lord of the House Kinshaya in the Klingon Empire
S'Leth - Romulan Admiral
Some anonymous strongman in Prime Industries

Offline Crazy Horse

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #7 on: February 27, 2005, 07:50:22 pm »
Ah, a civil war between the lizards is brewing.   Those with honor verses those that have been corrupted by Earther deviance.   This suits us well.   It will make the Federation so much easier to crush.  The SoS of the Tal’Shiar looks forward to the impending Gorn invasion.   It will be . . . glorious.

All hail our Namesake!!  All hail his Sons!!


Tal'Shiar, S.O.S. Command[/size][/color]

Offline KAT J'inn

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #8 on: February 27, 2005, 08:22:51 pm »
Beyond Federation Space the alien warship slowly breaks orbit from the uncharted planet.  It accelerates quickly, and once it passes the gravitational field limit it’s FTL engines create a subspace field bubble around its hull and it quickly slips between normal space and into subspace.

Behind another ship, the U.S.S. Enterprise, begins it’s own voyage away from the mysterious planet.  It’s Captain healing in the sick bay.

“Lacerations, abrasions, some minor internal injuries.”   McCoy mumbles as he monitors his medical scanner.

Kirk lays on one of the his ship’s medical beds.  The steady beeping of the heart rate monitor keeping a rhythmic reminder of his humanity.

“I feel like I just went ten rounds with a giant Gila Monster.”  Kirk moans. 

“You’re lucky that thing didn’t move too quickly.  You could have been killed.  As it is, I’m worried about an infection from those claw cuts you have.  Lord knows what type of organisms live on that thing’s hide.”   McCoy states as he sprays an antibiotic mixture onto the cuts.

“I am pleased that you finally remembered your basic chemistry Captain.”  The Vulcan states with a slight emphasis on the word “finally.”

“Well you will forgive me Mr. Spock if I learned warp field theory at the Academy instead of 17th Century Chemistry.”  Kirk say with a smile to MsCoy.

“Actually, sir, the Chinese first invented gunpowder in the . . .”   Spock states and then stop when Kirk waives off his statement.

“Spock, lets forgo history for now and work on the present.  I trust all data has been forwarded to Starfleet Command?” Kirk asks.

“It has.”  Spock responds.

“Something tells me this is not the last we have heard of the Gorn.  I wonder what that Gorn Commander is reporting to his superiors . . . . . .”


 . . . . . .

Stellar Date: 567.893.1

The Dragon’s Fire is in route to the Castile Sector for our debriefing with Admiral S’Cipio. We will arrive in one week. Computter, forward the following log briefing to Admiral S’Cipio via Sub-Space Comm Link.  Security Level Alpha.


Operation Cestus was a marginal success.  The alien outpost was eradicated.  Intelligence reports that the aliens were non-hostile is likely correct but not confirmable. 

Our Operation was interrupted by an alien warship of the same specie but not until the complete destruction of the outpost had been confirmed.  The warship equaled a Tyrannous Class Heavy Cruiser.  Therefore, the establishment of a defense outpost was not possible.   The Dragon Fire attempted an evasive retreat but both it and the alien ship suffered a sudden drive failure in System 572.

Apparently a Type 4 civilization took umbrage at our conflict and decided that it would be settled my corporal combat between myself and the alien commander.

The aliens are mammalian bi-peds.  Small, with no horns, claws, fangs or any other natural defenses.  I am amazed that they have been able to evolve.  They are however, extremely quick.

Since I was suffering from the flu.  <cough> And a severe case of Montezuma’s Revenge <cough> I was unable to <cough> defeat the pink skinned alien at first.

I then decided to test the alien’s sense of honor.   I <cough> pretended to allow it to stun me with a projectile.   I then <ahem> pretended to lie still, AT GREAT RISK TO MYSELF, in order to see if the alien would murder me.   It did not.

Therefore, I have to assume that they may not be barbarians.

Nevertheless, I hope our plans regarding the recent Coup D’Etat by that quasi-female are proceeding.   

Commander Agave Sends.     
« Last Edit: February 27, 2005, 08:33:02 pm by J'inn »

Offline Kroma BaSyl

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #9 on: February 28, 2005, 07:39:33 pm »
bump for kimmy.
♥ ♥ ♥  GDA Kroma BaSyl  ♥ ♥ ♥
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Because this game makes me feel like  a thirteen year old girl trapped in a lizards body.

Offline Sirgod

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #10 on: March 01, 2005, 05:44:41 am »
Even the Fed's wear Pink sometimes...

Stephen looking at Kroma with a Gluttenous Gleam in his eye.  ;D ;D ;) ;)
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Offline Rolling

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #11 on: March 01, 2005, 07:12:38 am »
<snicker>

I don't know if you "guys" have noticed, I'm sure J'inn has during his mall excursions, but pink is in for real.  And it is in every store!!!

ACK!!!!

I perfer a deep passionate plum purple myself.

Fantastic writing.  ;D

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Offline FPF-Tobin Dax

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #12 on: March 01, 2005, 07:23:20 am »
Howdy Kim!
Suspected leader of Prime Industries, #1 Pirate Cartel

Offline FPF-DieHard

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #13 on: March 01, 2005, 08:41:20 am »
Is it just me or does the name "Autumn River" sound like it belongs in Porn?
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Offline GDA-S'Cipio

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #14 on: March 01, 2005, 08:57:29 am »
The Departure of S'Cipio:  Part 1


Many weeks ago......


Dr Nyet heard the voices murmuring around her as she forced her way through the crowded streets of G’hdar’s capital.  It was an experience she was used to but no longer enjoyed.  In her youth on Remus, the voices had been those of  young noblemen too attracted to her looks to be able to ignore her, and yet too afraid of her lineage to approach her.  That had been pleasant.   While life on G’hdar meant that no one would ever find her physically attractive again, the murmurs had continued to follow her in public.  Then it had been voices of young Gorn too offended at her heritage to ignore her, yet too afraid of her position to attack her directly.  That too, in it’s own way, she had grown to find pleasant.

This newest attention to her body on G’hdar, however, was insufferable. 

The streets were full of celebratory Gorn, all overly exuberant and most overly drunk.  They celebrated the defeat of the ISC, the capture of Gorgania (formerly Organia) and the liberation of the Orion Slave Girls.  Many of the freed slaves had been brought to G’hdar I for reintegration into polite society, and far too many drunken Gorn mistook her for a newly freed Orion.  To Gorn most humanoids looked similar, and this mistake was especially easy to make in the heat of G’hdar’s summer desert, when the slightest physical exertion could bring her copper-based blood close to her skin and cast a slight green tone to her complexion.  The attention was usually harmless, but it was always annoying.

“Little One!”  screamed a giant reptilian beast who pulled his snout away from his bottle long enough to notice her.  He stumbled towards her in a rolling gait – first tacking left and then tacking right – like a sailor in high seas trying to cross a pitching deck.  Anything that slow and awkward should have been easy to avoid, but Gorn were deceptively fast once they got themselves moving.

“Little One!” he repeated – sour alcohol dripping from his breath – as he gripped her ribs firmly between his hands and lifted her from the ground.  The air was crushed from her lungs, giving her skin an even greener tint.  “We have won!!  Isss not freedom wonderful!”

Apparently an answer was not required, which was fortunate since Dr Nyet was incapable of speaking and, indeed, only a second from passing out.  He immediately returned her to the ground and spun her around three times.  “Go and tassste freedom!” the beast insisted, and shoved her on her way.

 Dr Nyet did her own impression of a sailor on a pitching deck as she stumbled dizzily on her way, desperately forcing air back into her lungs and seeking the refuge of the phone booth that had been her goal.  “Someday,” she gasped to herself, “a virus bomb in the city water supply.  It would be a mercy to the universe.”  Then, once she had made sure to bolt the door against the hundreds of helpful Gorn beasts who all wanted to show the little slave girl how to use a phone, she straightened her uniform, perfected her hair and makeup, and placed her call.

Being the wife of the current senior member of the Gorn Tri-Bruce Commission gave her many privileges.  One of these was access to the famous Gold Channel Lines, a series of top priority subspace relay stations that allowed diplomatic messages to be sent between imperial capitals in near real-time.  She could do this from the safety of her own room, but always chose to brave the streets and use a payphone.  A call to Remus would bring disgrace to any Gorn, especially her husband, and she would NOT disgrace family. 

The face that appeared on the monitor before her was instantly recognizable as a Romulan Patrician.  The uplifted, white tufted eyebrows and the hooked beak of a nose gave him the appearance of a fierce bird of prey, and that was exactly the way he had lived his life.   Senator Tiberius Augustus Nyet had lifted his family from mere nobility to the inner circle of power on Remus in a single generation.  There was no member of any great house who did not whisper that he might someday have become Praetor, if only he had chosen a better match for his daughter. 

“Hello father,” began the young woman.

“Daughter,” answered the Senator.  “An unexpected surprise.  Have you at last gotten something out of that monstrous husband of  yours that we can use for the benefit of the empire?”

“You forced me into this marriage, father, to cement an alliance you didn’t allow to survive past the next war.  Do not complain when the daughter you cast aside brings you no rewards.”

“The empire does not always give us pleasant duty, daughter.  Still, you must serve it as well as you can.  The ISC are defeated.  The General War in the west is under way again, and will surely reach us.  Where has your husband stationed his fleets?  Where can we strike to do the most damage?”

Dr Nyet lifted one eyebrow in a show of ironic curiosity.  It was a gesture she had learned from her father, and thus was sure to irritate him.  “Family does not betray family, Father.  You taught me that.  You made me marry S’Cipio, and so now he is family.  If you want him to service the empire then best you should welcome him home as a son.”

There were times that Dr Nyet was very glad that she was born Romulan rather than Vulcan.   The freedom her people felt to express emotion sometimes let you know *exactly* what the other person thought.  She took great pleasure in reading from her father’s face the words he would not permit himself to say out loud.  In fact, so much blood rushed there that he almost looked like an Orion Slave Girl himself.

“You bring him home, and I’ll present him publicly as my son-in-law,” Tiberius Augustus forced out between thin lips.  He meant the words as an insult to her – living with a Gorn husband on Remus would be an even greater disgrace than living with one on G’hdar – but the words also carried with them the seeds of a brilliant idea.  “Now,” he continued in cold tones, “is there some reason you called?”

“Happy birthday, Father.  I hope you are well.”  Her father had always forgotten his own birthday.  She gave him time look surprised before she hung up on him.

Then she used his brilliant idea to place her second call.

On the way home she found herself "greeted"  by three more over-eger drunken lizard well-wishers.  Ribs were crushed.  Streetdancing was forced.  She even suffered the indignity of having a Gorn kiss planted on her cheek.   Frankly, she was surprised to survive the journey.

“That’s it!” she screamed in the safety of her bedroom, ripping her casual clothes from her body and tossing them into the disintegrator.  “Until every one of those green tarts is off this blasted rock, I will wear nothing but a Romulan dress uniform!”

She strode naked across the hardwood floor, shoving trembling and crying Skolean maidservants aside, and ripped the solid oak doors off of her wardrobe.

What she found there did not make her happy.

Her husband was not going to survive long enough to play his part in her new plot.

“S’CIPIO!!!!!!!!!”

Windows rattled and walls shook.  Her maidservants rushed to get her disruptor pistol.  They knew her moods.

-S'Cipio
"I cannot undertake to lay my finger on that article of the Constitution which granted a right to Congress of expending, on the objects of benevolence, the money of their constituents."  - James Madison (chief author of the Constitution)

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Offline SSCF-LeRoy

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #15 on: March 01, 2005, 11:01:34 am »
I wonder if the fact that Dr. Nyet's name translates as "Dr. No" carries any significance...

Offline TheJudge

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #16 on: March 01, 2005, 11:52:46 am »
Ya ne znaiou, shto te govareesh!
He who can master the data controls the world.

Offline GDA-Agave

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #17 on: March 02, 2005, 03:54:55 pm »

Commander Agave Sends.     


Well.........hasn't someone been eating his Wheaties lately!!    You are tempting fate my friend.    That thick feline fur would like nice as a wall trophy.   8) 

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Offline FPF-DieHard

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #18 on: March 02, 2005, 03:57:26 pm »

 . . .  That thick feline fur would like nice as a wall trophy.   8) 





Just ask Firesoul

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Offline KAT J'inn

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #19 on: March 02, 2005, 04:02:16 pm »
Okay . . .  I now agree with the Entire Klingon Navy.

Die Hard . . . you are a bastard.

Firesoul too.

Oh what the hell. Throw in Nail for good measure.


Offline TheJudge

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #20 on: March 02, 2005, 05:48:38 pm »
Meanwhile MY mother was married to my father when I was born so I am not a bastard.


I am a mean ass prick though, and someone spent a lot of time showing me their ass last night, right before he got two of his buddies and beat up on me. 
He who can master the data controls the world.

Offline FPF-DieHard

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #21 on: March 02, 2005, 05:54:37 pm »
. . .  and someone spent a lot of time showing me their ass last night, right before he got two of his buddies and beat up on me. 

I think the Klingons call that "Foreplay."   ;D
Who'd thunk that Star-castling was the root of all evil . . .


Offline TheJudge

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #22 on: March 02, 2005, 07:14:54 pm »
That's the bad thing, guys get up and shake their ass in front of me and I forget all about his buddies until it's too late...:)
He who can master the data controls the world.

Offline Strafer

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #23 on: March 02, 2005, 10:29:42 pm »
Judge can't get wise so now it's like fishing.... the jig is up!
Who's next to jiggle? Judge-bait needed. Not to troll or anything. You can always form a line...

I'll ponder some more while the candidates stream in...
--
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Lineage II
Server                           Sieghardt                    deviantrealms.com (dead)
Chars       Strafer          L24 Rogue                  L64 Hawkeye
                StrayFar       L64 Tyrant                  L51 Tyrant
                StrawFur      L37 Scavenger            L49 Bounty Hunter
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Offline GDA-Agave

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #24 on: March 02, 2005, 11:55:56 pm »

I'll ponder some more while the candidates stream in...

Like ANYONE shows their ass quicker than J'inn................please   ;D   ;D

One of the few, the proud, THE GORN!!
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Offline KAT Chuut-Ritt

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #25 on: March 03, 2005, 06:33:35 am »

I'll ponder some more while the candidates stream in...

Like ANYONE shows their ass quicker than J'inn................please   ;D   ;D



Does mooning count?   ;D

Offline Kroma BaSyl

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #26 on: March 03, 2005, 08:05:59 am »

I'll ponder some more while the candidates stream in...

Like ANYONE shows their ass quicker than J'inn................please   ;D   ;D



Geez!!!! It's like I am invisible or something. <sob>
♥ ♥ ♥  GDA Kroma BaSyl  ♥ ♥ ♥
GCS Prima Ballerina
GCS PHAT Gorn
GCS Queen Kroma


Because this game makes me feel like  a thirteen year old girl trapped in a lizards body.

Offline SOS Cleopatra

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #27 on: March 03, 2005, 08:46:57 am »

I'll ponder some more while the candidates stream in...

Like ANYONE shows their ass quicker than J'inn................please   ;D   ;D



Geez!!!! It's like I am invisible or something. <sob>

The earth moves for me when I wiggle my hips too, but unlike in your case, objects don't fall off the shelves.   ;)


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Offline Barack Beard

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #28 on: March 03, 2005, 01:06:14 pm »
Now Queen Kroma!  you are being way to humble, lets go back to the true beginning of your rise to power.

I remember it well:


Things had looked grim on Gdhar.  Ever since the "Gorganian Disaster" the Confederation's navies had been driven back by the Pacification forces.  The buffer zones were no longer buffers, but rather staging zones for further ISC penetrations into Gorn homespace.  The colony worlds were falling, loses were heavy.  Even the flagship the Brucimus Maximus had limped off the front with massive damage, looking like and old french tank after an encounter with panzers.  The ISC was in fact driving on the nearest of the Gorn homeworlds with little to stand in its way, most captains having decided to try their luck on the safer fronts.

One obstacle did remain, however, Task force 69 led by Rear Admiral Kroma Basyl, consisting of a dreadnaught and assorted support ships including a Miridan destroyer flotilla under Commodore Firesoul's command.  Rear Admiral Kroma realized he was fighting a losing battle on the front, having nothing in his megre armada that could stand up to the ISC flagship and her fleet.  He relized his only chance to save Gdhar was to seperate the enemy battleship from her support vessels, but it would require a great risk. 

The only way was to spring a trap, and every trap needed bait, nd the only bait big enough was the Prima Ballerina.  Kroma had one advantage though, the enemy flag was piloted by a captain whose strengths and weaknessess he knew well, the traitor Agave.  Strutting his ship in front of the enemy, Kroma filled his old comrade with a lust for wanting to take down the Prima Ballerina.  His ship was no match for the enemy, but he had to lure him into position with a perfectly executed plasma ballet, that at moments seemed to get daring close to becoming the lap dance that Agave wanted so badly.

Finally, with his last reserves Kroma placed the enemy captain in the position he wanted him in, the "G-spot".  The ISC battleship was now pinned between Gdhar and the rest of taskforce 69, which had arrived from the rear.  Firesoul took command of the planetary defenses and the protective Starbases (which Firesoul had refitted with Mirdan technology) while Kroma rejoined the rest of his forces to cut off retreat.  The enemies only chance now was to smash through the starbase defenses and force the Gorn to surrender or have their homeworld destroyed.

It was a frantic battle as the citizens of Gdhar looked up into the heavens watching the live broadcast, knowing their very lives and the future of their entire race depended on it.  Knowing that deserted by their leaders, their only hope for a future as a free race depended on a rag tag fleet and a Gorn in a tutu. Then it happened....

The enemy flagship suddenly broke apart in an explosion visible to the naked eyes of the Gorn looking heavenward.  And out of the sky flew in Firesoul, leading the Prima Ballerina and the rest of Task Force 69 to its homecoming.

As Kroma transported down to the planet, the local populance was chanting "Kroma!" "Kroma!" "Kroma!" and the local leaders had somehow come up with a long pink carpet which was rolled out as the Rear Admiral strode forth the adress the citizenry.  Kroma was overwhelmed by their warm reception, and a tear came to the hero's eye.  Barely managing to get a few words of humble gratitude for the welcome recieved, Kroma was on the verge of returning to his ship. 

At that moment one humble Gorn clad in a marvelous pink gown stumbled forward, adoration in her eye.  The city leaders tried to keep her at bay so as not to disturb the hero, but Kroma recognized her, and waved her forward.  That Gorn, he remembered had designed his very first tutu.  He remebered that day, when she saw Kroma still dressed in the stadard uniform, gazing longingly at the dresses in her shop through the store window, and had cordially waved him in on that day without judging him.  On that day he became a Diva.

S'Trupaul collapsed at the hero's feet, and cried out "Don't leave us leaderless again!, when the Tri-Bruce council fled only you remained, you Kroma BaSyl our savior."
Kroma urged her to rise but she refused clasping at his ankles.  He argued,  "My duties as a Rear Admiral, require me to persue the advantage we have gained, citizen."  But S'Trupaul looked up and begged, "But your duty to the Gorn of the homeworlds, and of the colonies as well require you to stay and lead us, the leaderless, won't you be our Queen!"

Kroma was stunned by the words, but the citizens were not, a euphoric expression took hold on all those who had been in earshot.  Then it started, first among those few who had heard S'Trupaul, then by those who heard them, then by others as the chanting spread like a wildfire out of control, within minutes it was being shouted by those who were watching it broadcast, and was being chanted soon by every Gorn on the homeworlds.  The chant of "Long Live Queen Kroma!", the plea of a leaderless race in their demand for their hero to lead them.

And that was how it really started your highness.  There is no more Conferation, in fact that word shall no longer exist, I'll have the Committee on correct thinking make that adjustment in the next version of the Histories of Gdhar, as soon as they finish placing this account of your becoming Queen in the records.  Are there any other changes you would like to make?

Kroma pursed the royal lips a moment, "Well I never particularly cared for the word 'FAT'"

Offline TheJudge

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #29 on: March 03, 2005, 01:40:18 pm »
And people wonder why me and my shorts-clad crew of stud muffins are chosen to patrol the Gorn border and render assistance as needed.


*sigh*
He who can master the data controls the world.

Offline GDA-Agave

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #30 on: March 05, 2005, 09:40:51 pm »
Why you crusty-scaled reptilian whore!!!!!!!

Long and painful will your torture be! (and not the kind you like)   I will hang you dissected body parts form the tallest steeple of The Creator.

Mark my words, S'Trupaul.   I will make it my mission to crush under my claws as I have done to so many others that got in my way when I ascended to the TRI-BRUCE commission.


Agave
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Offline Barack Beard

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #31 on: March 05, 2005, 10:46:04 pm »
Why you crusty-scaled reptilian whore!!!!!!!

Long and painful will your torture be! (and not the kind you like)   I will hang you dissected body parts form the tallest steeple of The Creator.

Mark my words, S'Trupaul.   I will make it my mission to crush under my claws as I have done to so many others that got in my way when I ascended to the TRI-BRUCE commission.

 
Agave

Long and painful describesss tenure of the TRI-BRUCE commissssion. And why not ssspell it like it isss the TRY BRUCE commissssion, that would dessscribe your rissse more accurately asss you allowed all the sssenior Gorn to "try" you during your assscent.  I know the  talessss of your sssharing quartersss with S'Cipio on thossse debauched tripsss the Earth'sss vacation city of Orlando.  How you were only along due to your ssskills at sssomething code named a "Wood-Wind" inssstrument. And hearing S'Cipio  proclaim that noone could blow a note like Agave, made it readily apparent what wasss really going on.  Now we find you chasssing your old amore into the armsss of the enemy, but I guessss the wedding wasss political and he will need a missstresss on Romulassss.

I can hear the SOS and the other Rommiesss ssssinging now

AGAVE:       I'm a Bruce, and I'm okay.
                  I  sleep all night and I work all day.

ROMMIES:    He's a Bruce, and he's okay.
                  He sleeps all night and he works all day.

AGAVE:       I slam down beers I eat chocodiles.
                  I go to the lavatory.
                 On Wednesdays I go bowling
                 And fly for the ISC

ROMMIES:   He slams down beers. He eats chocodiles.
                 He goes to the lavatory.
                 On Wednesdays he goes bowling
                 And flies for the ISC
                 He's a Bruce, and he's okay.
                 He sleeps all night and he works all day.

AGAVE:       I slam down shots. I skip and jump.
                  I like to plasma ballet.
                  I put on women's clothing
                  And act as Scippy’s Valet.

ROMMIES:    He slams down shots. He skips and jumps.
                  He likes to plasma ballet.
                  He puts on women's clothing
                  And acts as Scippy’s Valet?!
                  He's a Bruce, and he's okay.
                  He sleeps all night and he works all day.

AGAVE:       I slam down shots. I wear high heels,
                  Suspendies, and a bra.
                  I wish I looked good in pink,
                  Just like Queen Kroma.

ROMMIES:   He slams down shots. He wears high heels,
                 Suspendies, and a bra?!
[talking]     What's this? Wants to look good in pink?! Oh, My!
                And I thought you were so rugged! Poofter!...
[singing]     He's a Bruce and he's okay.
                 He sleeps all night and he works all day.
                 He's a Bruce, and he's okaaaaay.
                 He sleeps all night and he works all day.

Offline Kroma BaSyl

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Re: The Queendom of Kromydia, how it all began.
« Reply #32 on: March 16, 2005, 02:31:09 pm »
♥ ♥ ♥  GDA Kroma BaSyl  ♥ ♥ ♥
GCS Prima Ballerina
GCS PHAT Gorn
GCS Queen Kroma


Because this game makes me feel like  a thirteen year old girl trapped in a lizards body.