Topic: Dear ISC

[Hexx]

Dear ISC

How are you today? Well I hope because I have some unfortunate news for you.
After careful examination of the map (and trying to keep our Klingon pet...allies from eating it)
We have come to the conclusion that in order to smite Feds & the eternally tacky "Mirdan" we have to go through you.
Here's the really bad news.
Currently offensive operations are planned for 2271. Our best estimates (often surprisingly accurate) would seem to suggest that
you won't develop a ship capable of dominatin the battlefield until at least 2279.Plus of course there's the question of pilot skill..
Now I realize you probably got confused at the first sentence (you have chosen to fly ISC after all)
This essentially means that you will be getting beat on for eight ( game years before you can produce a ship that can make up
for the....handicap of your pilots.

After this time I think I can assure you that you won't have the ability to build any ships, not having any space left.

So why not save yourselves the trouble?
You know you're no match for the Lyran Empire nor our Romulan allies. Sure you can kick a few Klinks around, but there's hundreds
of them,and they keep coming back.
And who do you think is going to counterbalance us?
The Mirdan?-Please, this is the kind of list that will draw the super cheesey poof players to it, they'll try out the new toys, see that they're not that much better than the old toys and go back to playing with those goofy ships on UAW.
The Feds? LOL, Dh himself is trying to convince me not to build a Lyran DNH so he won't have to fight me in it, the rest of them are apparently trying to see who can out do Kroma's reign of terror in a CB.

So anyway, in the interest of Interstellar Harmony you should just not bother, you've all obviosuly signed up for the cheeseboat CCZ, and you won't ever get to use one.
Isn't that sad?

So in short, join someone else, join the Feds so we can have something to do (killing DH & Leboy over & over will get boring)
Or join the Klinks an we'll hopr for IFF malfunctions.

But if you persist in this "Join the ISC" I can promise you'll have a really short and boring gaming experience.



Corodially Yours
Hexx
Ship Assigner guy of the Lyran Empire.

[FPF-DieHard]

The Feds? LOL, Dh himself is trying to convince me not to build a Lyran DNH so he won't have to fight me in it, the rest of them are apparently trying to see who can out do Kroma's reign of terror in a CB.

 

[Hexx]

See? he's writhing in agony at the thought of it...

[Julin Eurthyr]

To the Booster Seat of the
Imperial Warlord Hexx
Lyran Empire
LRS Sippy Cup, Flagship

From the desk of the
Ambassador
Julin Eurthyr, Admiral
Commander, ISCS Little Paradise, Flagship of the 673rd Jello Echelon

Dear Imperial Shortlord,

I have to point out a few things that you have, ahem, overlooked.

Skill of ISC pilots: Try flying our Early DNs, and the plain DN series.  You will notice that they are some of the finest ships to practice such things as flight skill in.
Whether it's the early DN that turns like a Lyran BB, or the DN / DNZ that has to keep the opponent outside of range 4 in the FA arc to be effective, with that same BB-esque turn mode.

Cheese of ISC navy: The CCZ is not cheesy.  Consider that there's the entire ISC carrier force out there too, and the CCZ-armed BCV is a choice that we're being told is available.  Would you like Swiss, or Sharp?

Dominance of the Battlefield:  You are so sadly mistaken.  Perhaps you need to be educated in the quality pain that can only be inflicted by the G-torp, a weapon our ships shall carry in abundance these first few years of the server.  Within the first couple of days of the server, we're going to get our PPD, at which point we can start our plans to dominate the battlefield.  Don't forget that we also carry the T-bomb...

You know, I was thinking in the interest of Interstellar Harmony, and a brilliant thought came upon me.

Perhaps you, just you surrender yourself immediately to the ISC high command.  We'll find a nice planet off in the corner of ISC space somewhere, and have about 500 VCs slapped on it.  The challenge will be for both sides to race to this one world.  The first to claim it will get the 500 VCs, the other team will suddenly find themselves with a new, Ally, in the form of an Imperial Warlord, to lead them in their time of defeat...

[762_XC]

Dear ISC

You are a bunch of cheesy bastards!

Love,

t00l

[Hexx]

To
Julin Eurthyr,Admiral
Commander ISCS Tiny Fantasy

Dear Sir

While I truly appreciate your offer to give me my own planet, I am afraid that the
Lyran Empire already has my loyalty, and that your attempts at bribery are worth less
than stock in your PPD manufacturer's will soon be.

However , unfortunately you seemed to have missed my point.
As I assume you are distracted easily by bright shiny objects, "professional" wrestling, and
Jerry Springer, I will try and be a little less subtle in my points.

Whether or not the ISC BCV is cheesier or not than the CCZ is irrelevant. You won't have
the production ability to build one by 2279, let alone territory to deploy it in.
And while your threat of the "G" torp is amusing, It's assumed you'll be no more successful
with them than you are with the equivalent spot.

It should be noted though, that the Lyran Empire is not tyrannical.
We have no wish to impose ourselves over anything other than the burnt out remains of the
Hydran and Kzinti territories.
If, on the first day of the server, you withdraw all ISC forces to the respective Hydraki, Federation, and Gorn borders
until our forces havefinished the liberation of all territories you now claim outside of ISC original space.
 Your forces will then be permitted to disarm peacefully, and your troops will be
escorted back to the ISC original territory.

Truly then you will have achieved your goals.
The known Galaxy will have be divided up amongst the Lyran Empire and our peace loving Elfin friends,
 the Romulan Star Empire.
It will truly be a Galaxy at peace.

It is the hope and desire of the Lyran people that you can look beyond your petty
desires and foolish pride, and do what is right for ALL sentient races of the galaxy.

Respectfully Yours

Hexx
Emissary for Galactic Peace.

[Julin Eurthyr]

Dearest Peacelord:

Finally.  A person amongst the hordes that shows a glimmer of intelligence.

Seems that our constant babbling of "surrender and be pacified" seems to have finally reached an audience.

For you have used our very own lines in this missive back to me.

Therefore, I ask you, to recognize the entirity of what you have said.

1.  A request for the ISC to "back off", while you reclaim your "pre-war" borders.  Well, we've set up shop in, what we were told, are "neutral" zones.  Neutral, IIRC, means NOT OWNED BY ANYBODY.  Therefore, you have no claim on the territory we're currently occupying.  I see no need for us to "back off" from territory you declined to accept, or decided to leave empty as a buffer between your kind, warm and fuzzy Coalition with your Klingon and Romulan compatriots and the Kind, forthright and honest Alliance.  Also, our occupation is not a claim of ownership, we are just protecting it under the Organian Mandate of some stardate that I don't have handy with me today...

2.  Peace amongst the galaxy means a galaxy that does not need "dividing up", peace means that what's yours is yours, and what's theirs is theirs.  You have just as much claim to this "Hydraki" territory you adivse us to occupy as this neutral zone mentioned in point 1, for a truly peaceful galaxy to be a reality.  We have realized this, and do not plan on taking any one side's territory.  We ask you to do the same.  By leaving these "Hydraki's" and the Federation alone, you will help us in our quest for a truly peaceful galaxy, as there will be no fighting, a point you are just as eager to see as we are.

So, since we are only occupying these neutral zones, not claiming them, and you too seek a peaceful resolution to this conflict, then I can expect to see the next letter agreeing with you, and plans to throw the might of the Lyran Star Navy behind the ISC in our quest to give peace a chance, correct?

I thank you for your cooperation.

[KAT Chuut-Ritt]

You call that diplomacy?  I'll show you diplomacy.....

<Chuut walks up to Hexx, looks down, turns around>

*SPRAY SPRAY SPRAY*

Consider yourself OWN3D!


Now that is diplomacy.......

[GDA-Agave]

What I read

To
Julin Eurthyr,Admiral
Commander ISCS Tiny Fantasy

Dear Sir,

blah, blah, blah

....bright shiny objects, "professional" wrestling, and Jerry Springer.....

blah, blah, blah


Respectfully Yours

BlahMaster
Missionary for a Galactic Piece.

Ok, now back to your regularly-scheduled bat channel.

    

[FA Frey XC]

Dear ISC

You are a bunch of cheesy bastards!

Love,

t00l

Dear Hydrans,

You are a bunch of GASSY bastards!!!!

Talk about cheese.....

<snicker>

[Hexx]

Dearest Peacelord:

Finally.  A person amongst the hordes that shows a glimmer of intelligence.

Seems that our constant babbling of "surrender and be pacified" seems to have finally reached an audience.

For you have used our very own lines in this missive back to me.

Therefore, I ask you, to recognize the entirity of what you have said.

1.  A request for the ISC to "back off", while you reclaim your "pre-war" borders.  Well, we've set up shop in, what we were told, are "neutral" zones.  Neutral, IIRC, means NOT OWNED BY ANYBODY.  Therefore, you have no claim on the territory we're currently occupying.  I see no need for us to "back off" from territory you declined to accept, or decided to leave empty as a buffer between your kind, warm and fuzzy Coalition with your Klingon and Romulan compatriots and the Kind, forthright and honest Alliance.  Also, our occupation is not a claim of ownership, we are just protecting it under the Organian Mandate of some stardate that I don't have handy with me today...

2.  Peace amongst the galaxy means a galaxy that does not need "dividing up", peace means that what's yours is yours, and what's theirs is theirs.  You have just as much claim to this "Hydraki" territory you adivse us to occupy as this neutral zone mentioned in point 1, for a truly peaceful galaxy to be a reality.  We have realized this, and do not plan on taking any one side's territory.  We ask you to do the same.  By leaving these "Hydraki's" and the Federation alone, you will help us in our quest for a truly peaceful galaxy, as there will be no fighting, a point you are just as eager to see as we are.

So, since we are only occupying these neutral zones, not claiming them, and you too seek a peaceful resolution to this conflict, then I can expect to see the next letter agreeing with you, and plans to throw the might of the Lyran Star Navy behind the ISC in our quest to give peace a chance, correct?

I thank you for your cooperation.

<sigh>

Dear Stupidhead.

It seems you are unfortunately missing one of the points of our generous offer.

It's non- negotiable.

You do not have

A) The Ships

or especially

B) The pilots capable of winning in those pre-PPD warships
to offer us any sort of worthwhile resistance.

Tell you what, you keep your goofy little "peacekeepers" flying practice missions back in ISC original territory until 2279. Then the CCZ will come out and you'll be
able to assign lots & lots of them. The CCZ (and yes the ISC BCV) are nice enough ships that they'll make even your pilots a challenge to kill.
Of course I'm sure Blade (I believe he's flying) will continue his claims to be "an elite pilot' while building the biggest cheesiest ship he can find.
(BBVZ or something equally nasty Im sure)

Then. once you have the super cheesy CCZ's BCV's whatver you can try and come out to face us.

Plus it will give you an extra 10 days to work on your excuses.
We can send you some of Dizzy's if you want, he's got a stockpile of them ready to go.


Sincerely
Hexx
DNH Pilot for SGO.

[FPF-DieHard]

B) The pilots capable of winning in those pre-PPD warships
to offer us any sort of worthwhile resistance.

Um, anyone want to tell Hexx tha the PPD ships are out on day one of the server?   

Then. once you have the super cheesy CCZ's BCV's whatver you can try and come out to face us.

I-BCV?   It's un-modded from OP+

[Hexx]

B) The pilots capable of winning in those pre-PPD warships
to offer us any sort of worthwhile resistance.

Um, anyone want to tell Hexx tha the PPD ships are out on day one of the server?   

Grrrrrr

SHADDUP!!!!!!!!!!!
(This is why I hate races I know nothing about)

Fine
The PPD ships aren't enough to save you, only those stupid rear firing F topr thingys are.
Without them you'll die. The PPD's will Im sure keep it interesting, but the end result is the same.

[762_XC]

Dear ISC

You are a bunch of cheesy bastards!

Love,

t00l

Dear Hydrans,

You are a bunch of GASSY bastards!!!!

Talk about cheese.....

<snicker>

Dear Frey,

You are a cheese munching,
CAD flying,
belly button picking,
Dewars quaffing,
cow chip hurling,
SFC3 playing,
BASTARD!

Love,

t00l

[Julin Eurthyr]

<sigh>

Dear Stupidhead.

It seems you are unfortunately missing one of the points of our generous offer.

It's non- negotiable.

You do not have

A) The Ships

or especially

B) The pilots capable of winning in those pre-PPD warships
to offer us any sort of worthwhile resistance.

Tell you what, you keep your goofy little "peacekeepers" flying practice missions back in ISC original territory until 2279. Then the CCZ will come out and you'll be
able to assign lots & lots of them. The CCZ (and yes the ISC BCV) are nice enough ships that they'll make even your pilots a challenge to kill.
Of course I'm sure Blade (I believe he's flying) will continue his claims to be "an elite pilot' while building the biggest cheesiest ship he can find.
(BBVZ or something equally nasty Im sure)

Then. once you have the super cheesy CCZ's BCV's whatver you can try and come out to face us.

Plus it will give you an extra 10 days to work on your excuses.
We can send you some of Dizzy's if you want, he's got a stockpile of them ready to go.


Sincerely
Hexx
DNH Pilot for SGO.

Dear Imperial Dimbulb

Here I thought I was doing the galaxy a favor, by attempting to fan the spark of intelligence you have oh-so recently shown.  Unfortunately, I now have confirmation that your crown is, in reality, a Helm of Brilliance, 40 watt.

And, sadly enough, my posts have burnt out the bulb...

Let's try this again, in simpler terms...
First, the details (or at least the really important stuff):

<snip>
It should be noted though, that the Lyran Empire is not tyrannical.
We have no wish to impose ourselves over anything... <snip>

If, on the first day of the server, you withdraw all ISC forces to the respective Hydraki, Federation, and Gorn borders
until our forces havefinished the liberation of all territories you now claim outside of ISC original space.
 Your forces will then be permitted to disarm peacefully, and your troops will be
escorted back to the ISC original territory.

Truly then you will have achieved your goals.
<snip>
It will truly be a Galaxy at peace.

It is the hope and desire of the Lyran people that you can look beyond your petty
desires and foolish pride, and do what is right for ALL sentient races of the galaxy.

Respectfully Yours

Hexx
Emissary for Galactic Peace.

Look at the words used here.  Peace, disarmament, and peace again.  The Ideals presented, such as looking beyond the petty desires, and the non-tyrannical nature of your empire are the most noble ideals presented by a non-Concordian to this point.

This is all very nice.  Then you go back to your tyrannical, barbaric ways telling us that we're not going to survive till we get our PPDs, or, since we start with them, our I-torps.  In that, as you didn't know that our ships will have PPDs, you also don't know that we do have elite pilots, ones that can take a CA and beat down a DN.  Heck, we'll wind up beating your DNH in our Command Cruiser.  I'm sure Blade will be more than willing to show you how that works.

Repent, and show us the true, peaceful Hexx you shown us just a couple of posts ago.  Let go of the evil, and be one with your inner pacifist.

I still eagerly await your statement telling us the mighty Lyran Empire plans to stand with the ISC in our quest for galactic peace.

[KAT Chuut-Ritt]

Fine
The PPD ships aren't enough to save you, only those stupid rear firing F topr thingys are.
Without them you'll die.

Why do rear firing plasma torpedoes bother you Hexx, its not like you usually the one chasing someone...... well, that is unless they stand between you and the red line..........