Topic: Colder than... (Read 4298 times)

Clark Kent · « **on:** December 14, 2004, 08:30:24 pm »

Colder than a witch?s left?
Yes, it?s that time of year again- winter. And today marked the first time this winter that the temp dropped beneath 0 degrees Fahrenheit. What does this mean? It means that for the first time this season it is colder than a witch?s left titty out.
But wait? What does that mean, exactly? Good question. But one that only raises more questions.
For example: exactly how cold is a witches left titty? Why is it so cold? IS it cold because of the weather, thus the phrase? Or is it because the witch is unable to warm her body up? Perhaps she is cold blooded? That raises the question: is a witch?s left titty endothermic or exothermic? If it is exothermic, perhaps she needs a better jacket. After all, flying around in a robe on a broomstick in the winter can?t be all that comfortable. If it?s endothermic, is it because the witches body temperature fluctuates with the weather, or is she (and her titty) set at a lower temperature by default? What temperature is this, exactly?
Why do we say ?colder than a witch?s left titty?? Why not the right one? Is the left one colder than the right? Is it smaller, and therefore more subject to the temperature around her? How big is a witch?s left titty? Does a witch have large titties, or tiny little ones? Does a witch even have a titty? Would you even want to see a witch?s titty?
I think it?s fair to say that the left titty is colder that the right one on a witch, otherwise we would talk about the wintriness of the right titty. Since the left titty is assumed to be colder, is it even the same color as the right titty?
Who exactly developed this phrase? Did this person have a great deal of experience with witch?s titties? Was he or she an expert on witch?s titties? Did he or she have witch?s titties? Did he or she use them in place of air-conditioning in the summer? Were these titties capable of being used in place of air-conditioning?
Where can one find a witch?s titty? Are witch?s titties an oppressed class?
As you can see, the questions raised by this phrase are numerous and complex to answer. We may never really know the full answers without a detailed, thourough and scientific examination of several witch?s titties, especially the left ones. But damned if it ain?t colder than a witch?s left titty out!

J. Carney · « **Reply #1 on:** December 14, 2004, 08:44:46 pm »

Yeah... it's cold here in Alabama... 30 F! IT's even supposed to get into the TEENS this weekend!

Brush Wolf · « **Reply #2 on:** December 14, 2004, 09:14:03 pm »

I thought that you were in the Twin Cities area Clark. We haven't been below zero here in Duluth yet although Monday was pretty brutal with the temperature under 10 and the wind blowing at 40 MPH.

Clark Kent · « **Reply #3 on:** December 14, 2004, 10:05:15 pm »

I'm NW of minneapolis about 35 miles, so close enough. The temp this morning, I heard, was -3. I might have been wrong, but still...
Yeah, duluth can get brutal with superior right there.

Grand Master of Shadows NCC37385 · « **Reply #4 on:** December 14, 2004, 10:45:47 pm »

Supposed to get drop to between 15°-18° F tonight around here.

likkerpig · « **Reply #5 on:** December 14, 2004, 11:36:03 pm »

Geez, I really feel for you damn yankee's.

Up in my part of the Great White North it was 50f today, not bad for December....

Of course last week it was about -2f.
Gotta love chinooks!

Soreyes · « **Reply #6 on:** December 16, 2004, 03:41:01 am »

Gee Wiz it just might drop down to 51 degrees tonight here in San Jose CA.

Dracho · « **Reply #7 on:** December 16, 2004, 09:39:31 am »

Hmm.. we used to say, "Colder than a Colorado Well Digger's A$$" or "Cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey"..

Dracho · « **Reply #8 on:** December 23, 2004, 09:17:37 am »

As I walked outside this morning, the wind was blowing at about 30 mph, and the thermometer on my back porch read 1 degree F, I was inspired to utter another:

"It's cold enough to freeze the nuts off a polar bear"..

KnightAdvancer · « **Reply #9 on:** December 23, 2004, 03:06:11 pm »

It was around 60 or so not too long ago here.

Capt. Mike · « **Reply #10 on:** December 23, 2004, 04:43:51 pm »

Woke up, it was -1 F..climbed to a balmy 13...tonight, -8F...glad for the fireplace and the day off tomorrow

Mike

Brush Wolf · « **Reply #11 on:** December 23, 2004, 04:55:26 pm »

Quote from: Capt. Mike on December 23, 2004, 04:43:51 pm

Woke up, it was -1 F..climbed to a balmy 13...tonight, -8F...glad for the fireplace and the day off tomorrow

Mike

Heat wave. It was -14 when I went to work at 5:30 this morning and a balmy -4 this afternoon when I got off work. Looking forward to -19 tonight.

Clark Kent · « **Reply #12 on:** December 23, 2004, 05:08:34 pm »

Quote from: Brush Wolf on December 23, 2004, 04:55:26 pm

Heat wave. It was -14 when I went to work at 5:30 this morning and a balmy -4 this afternoon when I got off work. Looking forward to -19 tonight.

-19? Man, that's cold enough to even make a witch nip out.

Brush Wolf · « **Reply #13 on:** December 24, 2004, 09:14:02 am »

Damn, got up this morning and looked at the sun shining on my thermometer and even with that boost it still was only -10! The weather forcast was wrong also as it got to -21.

KnightAdvancer · « **Reply #14 on:** December 24, 2004, 07:20:01 pm »

My God! It's SNOWING! Litteral floating ice! Snowballs! South of Houston! If I'm correct, this is the first White Christmas in Houston EVER.

Nemesis · « **Reply #15 on:** December 24, 2004, 09:41:30 pm »

This odd. Just for the heck of it I checked the Houston weather on the weather network online (Link). It does indeed show your weather at 30 F and light snow. Tomorrow it says - (a minus sign no number) for a high. The icon that should show Sun, Clouds and precipitaion is just N/A for Christmas again I haven't seen that. Do they know something we don't? I have never seen that before and I use the Weather Network all the time.

So in case Houston isn't there in a few hours... Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year... wherever Houston gets to.

IAF Lyrkiller · « **Reply #16 on:** December 25, 2004, 11:14:49 pm »

Quote from: KnightAdvancer on December 24, 2004, 07:20:01 pm

My God! It's SNOWING! Litteral floating ice! Snowballs! South of Houston! If I'm correct, this is the first White Christmas in Houston EVER.

It snowed here in Friendswood, but it did not last for long.

Just plain old Punisher · « **Reply #17 on:** December 26, 2004, 11:23:29 am »

Had a santa anna here couple days back, went to about 73 costal, 75 inland.

Whenever the mercury drops below 50 we San Diegans panic and think the apoclypse is comming.

Ravok · « **Reply #18 on:** December 26, 2004, 01:53:27 pm »

Quote from: Punisher on December 26, 2004, 11:23:29 am

Had a santa anna here couple days back, went to about 73 costal, 75 inland.

Whenever the mercury drops below 50 we San Diegans panic and think the apoclypse is comming.

Same here in Fla. Anything below 60 and we start freezing.

I could not even comprehend if it snowed here. The chaos, mayhem, and destruction it would cause would be truly unbelievable.

People here cant drive on good sunny days.

Clark Kent · « **Reply #19 on:** December 26, 2004, 04:05:16 pm »

Drivers can't drive regardless of where you are or what the weather is like. And they will continue to get worse as americans refuse to take public trqansportation seriously and the roads fill up and as new safety features in cars lull them into a false sense of security.

Ravok · « **Reply #20 on:** December 26, 2004, 04:10:48 pm »

I honestly think the biggest problem is, aggressive driving and a general lack of common sense and manners.

If people slowed down and actually made an attempt to follow the Traffic regs, Our insurance would go down, and allot of lives would be saved.

Clark Kent · « **Reply #21 on:** December 26, 2004, 07:39:42 pm »

I don't think speed has alot to do with it. People can drive fast and still be safe and unaggressive. A little recognition of the fact that they're speeding around in 2000+ pounds of vehicle connected to the ground with only four points of a few square inches of rubber will go a long way. Courtesy, common sense, can they fix the problem? To some degree, but what we really need are conscientous people out on the road.

Jack Morris · « **Reply #22 on:** December 26, 2004, 07:54:59 pm »

Frigging Victoria (near the gulf coast, people) gets a ft. of snow and we are way north of there and what does Austin get? Just a colder than hades period with no ice or snow!

Maybe I'll get lucky and fuel prices will soar again...

Grand Master of Shadows NCC37385 · « **Reply #23 on:** December 26, 2004, 10:43:48 pm »

I was living in eastern Tennessee back in '93 during the "Storm of the Century". The night before they were calling for 3-4 inches of snow. Within 24 hours we had 38 inches of snow with 8' drifts. The nearby town had a total of 657 residents, that was everyone that was in the town's zip code. I lived 7.5 miles from town and the property I lived on had a common border with the Cherokee National Forest. It wasnt nothing to wake up to a black bear, deer, or wild turkeys running around in my yard.

When the blizzard hit, it snapped all but two telephone poles between town and where I lived. I had no power for 15 days. When the power went out, my furnace went too. I had to walk 1/4 mile through the snow to my uncles house. He didnt have an indoor bathroom...he didnt even have an outhouse. He "went" in the "woods". During the 15 days I ran out of smokes. My uncle had quit 17 years earlier, so I smoked the last ones he had bought...17 years earlier.

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Topic: Colder than... (Read 4298 times)