Topic: 2004 Darwin Awards

[Clark Kent]

This is proof positive hat women are the lesser intelligent of the two sexes:
A perpetual state of denial wherein they can not admit their mental handicap.


 
Don't hurt me!!!

[FPF-SCM_TraceyG_XC]

This is proof positive hat women are the lesser intelligent of the two sexes:
A perpetual state of denial wherein they can not admit their mental handicap.


 
Don't hurt me!!!

At least I can spell... 

[Clark Kent]

At least I can spell... 

Lack of spelling is not an indicator of intelligence, only an indicator that one is in too big a rush to spell check.
 

I'm going back behind my wall to hide again now.

[FPF-SCM_TraceyG_XC]

LOL

[Ravok]

Humans... such a diverse lot, from the incredibly intelligent to the incredibly stupid. Notice something though... all of the above Darwin awards were given to... MEN <snicker>

 My girls said the same thing. It is rather interesting not that you mention it. I don't believe i have ever seen a woman win, or be nominated.

[Capt. Mike]

Here's something close:

CLEANER POLISHES OFF PATIENTS
"For several months, our nurses have been baffled to find a patient dead in the same bed every Friday morning" a spokeswoman for the Pelonomi Hospital(Free State, South Africa) told reporters. "There was no apparent cause for any of the deaths, and extensive checks on the air conditioning system, and a search for possible bacterial infection, failed to reveal any clues." "However, further inquiries have now revealed the cause of these deaths... "It seems that every Friday morning a cleaning lady would enter the ward, remove the plug that powered the patient's life support system, plug her floor polisher into the vacant socket, then go about her business.
When she had finished her chores, she would plug the life support machine back in and leave, unaware that the patient was now dead. She could not, after all, hear the death rattle and eventually the solid beep over the whirring of her polisher. "We are sorry, and have sent a strong letter to the cleaner in question. Further, the Free State Health and Welfare Department is arranging for an electrician to fit an extra socket, so there should be no repetition of this incident. The inquiry is now closed." (Cape Times)


And then this:

5. A 27-year-old French woman lost control of her car on a highway near Marseilles and crashed into a tree, seriously injuring her passenger and killing herself. As a commonplace road accident, this would not have qualified for a Darwin nomination, were it not for the fact that the driver's attention had been distracted by her Tamagotchi key ring, which had started urgently beeping for food as she drove along. In an attempt to press the correct buttons to save the Tamagotchi's life, the woman lost her own.

So....women are not exempt

Mike

[Ravok]

 Thanks Mike! I thought there had to be a couple at least.

[Clark Kent]

 
 

[Capt. Mike]

Not to be outdone..a runner up (now that Winter is coming)

RUNNER-UP A man who shovelled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.


Mike

[Commander Maxillius]

Not to be outdone..a runner up (now that Winter is coming)

RUNNER-UP A man who shovelled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.


Mike

aggrvated assault; time served

[Harlax]

Here's a late entrant.  Who said the kitchen was safe?  Then again, it is, once again, a man.

http://www.cnn.com/2004/US/11/30/lava.lamp.death.ap/index.html

KENT, Washington (AP) -- A man who placed a lava lamp on a hot stovetop was killed when it exploded and sent a shard of glass into his heart, police said.

Philip Quinn, 24, was found dead in his trailer home Sunday night by his parents.

"Why on earth he was heating a lava lamp on the stove, we don't know," Kent Police spokesman Paul Petersen said Monday.

[Nemesis]

The Darwin Awards salute the improvement of the human genome by honoring those who accidentally kill themselves in really stupid ways.

The single basic rule by which Darwin Awards are determined.

[Mentat Jon]

Not to be outdone..a runner up (now that Winter is coming)

RUNNER-UP A man who shovelled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.


Mike

LOL, claim jump at your own risk I guess,

[manitoba1073]

the reason for no women being nominated yet is cause my ex-wife hasnt yet found a way to knock herself off yet though she had come close a couple times. lmao. she took being blonde to a whole new level. dont get me wrong even though we split up and i havent seen her in like six years or so i still love her. but thats another story. but yeah she would be a good canidate when it happens.

[Nemesis]

Female award "winner"l

Fast Food Fatality
2000 Darwin Award Nominee
Confirmed True by Darwin
The felonious antics of two fast-food managers ended tragically when their robbery cover-up scheme went up in smoke. Lisa, 22 year-old night manager of Burger King, conspired with the 34-year-old day manager to heist over $4000 from the restaurant.

They staged an elaborate fake robbery/arson, in which Lisa acted the part of the victim bound with duct tape and trapped in the walk-in cooler, while her co-conspirator started a small fire and walked off with a duffel bag of cash. A key part of their plan was a quick "rescue" of Lisa by the local fire department.

Unfortunately the wastebasket fire went unnoticed until the morning shift arrived to find a slow-burning smolder that had never erupted into the desired blaze. The air from the open door caused the smolder to burst into flames, and firefighters were summoned. They found Lisa in the freezer, chilled and semi-conscious, and rushed her to a hospital where she died from hypothermia.

When police nabbed her bungling 34-year-old accomplice with the cash stashed in a Burger King bag, she tearfully confessed the details of the crime, implicating Lisa in her own death. Her account was verified by the fact that Lisa?s body showed no signs of forced restraint, the duct tape was loose, and she could have easily freed herself from her bindings and escaped from the unlocked refrigerator.