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Topic: What not to do in Vegas  (Read 4626 times)

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Offline KAT J'inn

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What not to do in Vegas
« on: September 20, 2004, 07:10:55 pm »
I kept a journal.   I was going to post it but I just don't see how it's possible.   Too many issues.  So some low lights.


DO NOT READ IF EASILY OFFENDED!!!

You have been warned.


What not to do in Vegas . . .


1)  Never hit on a girl on a plane.   Too dangerous.  It's too hard to tell what they look like from the waist down.   I got a phone number and a free ride to my hotel.  When we got off the plane I realized her hips were a least a meter wide.   YIKES!!   During the drive I also learned she was nuts.  RUN AWAY RUN AWAY.

2) Biker chick are fun but a little scary.  One reffered to me as her "virgin bitch."   Something about me never being on a Harley before  and the fact that she was driving me around on the back of the beast.   Man did my arse hurt.

3)  Never  NEVER NEVER NEVER let a cabbie take you to a strip club of his choosing.   Just trust me here.  When I left the cabbie taking me <snickered> and said "I bet a cabbie brought you here"   grumble.

4)  THERE IS NO ALCOHOL SERVED IN CERTAIN STRIP CLUBS!!  ARRRRGggggggghhhhhhhhhh

5)  Never play blackjack next to a desperate drunk divorced older woman.  Trust me.   I bearly survived.

6)  If the Message Service Ad says "Non Sexual"   THEY ARE FRIKKIN LIARS!!!    (I'd love to tell this one but I don't think I should) Also, be careful of the two for one deal.  You will be out numbered.

7) NEVER DRINK 12 RED BULLS IN ONE DAY.  Oye.

8)  WHen getting an "Off Strip" hotel.  Make sure it is in walking distance of the strip and WITHOUT a ()*&#(*&#)(*&# highway in the way.   GRRRRRRRRRR

9)  Always get a rental car.  No matter what the weasel at the hotel sez.

10)  Don't get pissed off at the poor cab service and get a limo out of anger.  Your drunk.  Your stupid.  And you will be broke.

11)  Don't be an idiot and not ask the beauitiful Jamican girl you met in the hotel out to dinner because you think there will be something better at the clubs.  I'm an ass.

12) After drinking a lot of Red Bull it is unwise to start drinking Red Bull based drinks at a night club.   My hands still shake.

13)  Biker Chicks can drink more than you.  Trust me here.


I feel sick.






Offline Green

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Re: What not to do in Vegas
« Reply #1 on: September 20, 2004, 07:43:56 pm »
I kept a journal. 

Oooooo ... that is almost as bad as allowing photographs.  I thought we taught you better?

Quote
3)  Never  NEVER NEVER NEVER let a cabbie take you to a strip club of his choosing.   Just trust me here.  When I left the cabbie taking me <snickered> and said "I bet a cabbie brought you here"   grumble.

So I guess you never learned the lesson about not taking advice from gay cabbies?

Quote
4)  THERE IS NO ALCOHOL SERVED IN CERTAIN STRIP CLUBS!!  ARRRRGggggggghhhhhhhhhh

Let me guess?  Palamino allows drinks ... hmmm ... you must have really have gone off strip ...

Quote
6)  If the Message Service Ad says "Non Sexual"   THEY ARE FRIKKIN LIARS!!!    (I'd love to tell this one but I don't think I should) Also, be careful of the two for one deal.  You will be out numbered.

lol ... heard the story  (sts J'inn ;) )


Offline IAF Lyrkiller

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Re: What not to do in Vegas
« Reply #2 on: September 20, 2004, 11:25:10 pm »
Jinn, i have been to Las Vegas. the only problem i dont remember any of it... ;D

This ocured some 30 years ago... :o




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Offline SkyFlyer

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Re: What not to do in Vegas
« Reply #3 on: September 21, 2004, 02:44:34 am »
Jamacian girl eh? Bad J'inn. You didnt even give her my number.
Life is short... running makes it seem longer.

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Offline KAT MRess

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Re: What not to do in Vegas
« Reply #4 on: September 22, 2004, 08:31:00 am »
Been to Vegas several times...

 ::) Where to start, where to start...

I kept a journal.

As a lawyer you should know better. Anything you write will be copied, uprooted and replanted in Washington square and used against you.

Quote
DO NOT READ IF EASILY OFFENDED!!!

You have been warned.


Too late


Quote
1)  Never hit on a girl on a plane.   Too dangerous.  It's too hard to tell what they look like from the waist down.   I got a phone number and a free ride to my hotel.  When we got off the plane I realized her hips were a least a meter wide.   YIKES!!   During the drive I also learned she was nuts.  RUN AWAY RUN AWAY.

Well duh!. Remember alcohol hits you harder at higher altitudes. The more you drink they better they look.

Quote
2) Biker chick are fun but a little scary.  One reffered to me as her "virgin bitch."   Something about me never being on a Harley before  and the fact that she was driving me around on the back of the beast.   Man did my arse hurt.

Don't sit on the fender, use the back seat.  And NEVER date someone that could benchpress you.

Quote
3)  Never  NEVER NEVER NEVER let a cabbie take you to a strip club of his choosing.   Just trust me here.  When I left the cabbie taking me <snickered> and said "I bet a cabbie brought you here"   grumble.

Next time just take out your wallet and say "Just rob me now!"

Quote
4)  THERE IS NO ALCOHOL SERVED IN CERTAIN STRIP CLUBS!!  ARRRRGggggggghhhhhhhhhh

How do you think they keep their licences?

Quote
5)  Never play blackjack next to a desperate drunk divorced older woman.  Trust me.   I bearly survived.

This doesn't apply to just Vegas. BTW: which table was that...

Quote
6)  If the Message Service Ad says "Non Sexual"   THEY ARE FRIKKIN LIARS!!!    (I'd love to tell this one but I don't think I should) Also, be careful of the two for one deal.  You will be out numbered.

And this is a bad thing?

Quote
7) NEVER DRINK 12 RED BULLS IN ONE DAY.  Oye.

See # 5. One more word on this topic: Aspirin

Quote
8)  WHen getting an "Off Strip" hotel.  Make sure it is in walking distance of the strip and WITHOUT a ()*&#(*&#)(*&# highway in the way.   GRRRRRRRRRR

When making any sort of travel arrangements one must be aware of the certain advertising techniques. Allow me to translate:

Off-strip hotel = Located on the other side of the city, but we can't tell you that for fear of not getting your business.

Quote
9)  Always get a rental car.  No matter what the weasel at the hotel sez.

Remember, the weasel at the hotel (The concierge) will ALWAYS try to get you to spend more money. If you must take a taxi, DO NOT ask him anything,  TELL him where you want to go...  and no shortcuts! (they're even worse)

Quote
10)  Don't get pissed off at the poor cab service and get a limo out of anger.  Your drunk.  Your stupid.  And you will be broke.

Smack! It's a limo! What did you expect?

Quote
11)  Don't be an idiot and not ask the beauitiful Jamican girl you met in the hotel out to dinner because you think there will be something better at the clubs.  I'm an ass.

There is a reason she is in the hotel and not in the clubs. And it's either REALLY good (and expensive) or REALLY bad.

Quote
12) After drinking a lot of Red Bull it is unwise to start drinking Red Bull based drinks at a night club.   My hands still shake.

Lack of Blood in your alcohol?

Quote
13)  Biker Chicks can drink more than you.  Trust me here.

Of course they can! That's why they're biker chicks!



Well I hope you at least learned a few things. One more peice of advise when visiting Vegas...

Watch out for Female impersonators!
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Offline Lepton

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Re: What not to do in Vegas
« Reply #5 on: September 22, 2004, 11:38:48 am »
One thing to say.  DEBAUCHERY!!!!


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Offline Commander Maxillius

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Re: What not to do in Vegas
« Reply #6 on: September 22, 2004, 02:29:01 pm »
One thing to say.  DEBAUCHERY!!!!

 :woot:
I was never here, you were never here, this conversation never took place, and you most certainly did not see me.

Offline KAT J'inn

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Re: What not to do in Vegas
« Reply #7 on: September 22, 2004, 02:57:33 pm »

Quote
4)  THERE IS NO ALCOHOL SERVED IN CERTAIN STRIP CLUBS!!  ARRRRGggggggghhhhhhhhhh

Let me guess?  Palamino allows drinks ... hmmm ... you must have really have gone off strip ...



This is why I can't publish the entire log.  I'll get banned for life.  But . . . .


On this issue I asked for an explaination from the owner (demanded) of the "club".    It seems that within Vegas proper if there is full nudity they cannot server booze.   If it's just breasts in the wind, then booze is okay.   Palomino, it seems, is in a town called "North" Las Vegas and thus different rules apply.

Apparently, Las Vegas does have some standards.   Didn't seem to apply to the massage people though.  OYE!

« Last Edit: September 22, 2004, 03:23:30 pm by J'inn »

Offline Commander Maxillius

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Re: What not to do in Vegas
« Reply #8 on: September 22, 2004, 03:22:46 pm »
OMG!!! You're serious?!?!?!


must... go.... to Vegas......


and which massage parlor was that again? ;D
I was never here, you were never here, this conversation never took place, and you most certainly did not see me.

Offline KAT J'inn

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Re: What not to do in Vegas
« Reply #9 on: September 22, 2004, 03:26:18 pm »
OMG!!! You're serious?!?!?!


What?  You thought I was joking!??   LOL

I never joke about important stuff.  Money, debauchery, money.

Personally, I can't say that I like Vegas.  It's very plastic.  In so many ways. Gotta viist it at least once in life though.

I like South Beach much more.  But that's just a subjective opinion.


Offline Commander Maxillius

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Re: What not to do in Vegas
« Reply #10 on: September 22, 2004, 03:33:56 pm »
hey, contact's contact.

Where's South Beach?  "South" covers a lot of places, and although specifying "Beach" narrows it down a bit, there's still a lot of guesses.


My first is Miami, am I right?
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Offline KAT J'inn

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Re: What not to do in Vegas
« Reply #11 on: September 22, 2004, 03:38:45 pm »
hey, contact's contact.

Where's South Beach?  "South" covers a lot of places, and although specifying "Beach" narrows it down a bit, there's still a lot of guesses.


My first is Miami, am I right?

So young.  So naive.   So full of hope and promise.  <sniff>  I'm all verklimpt here.

Miami is correct.

Offline Kroma BaSyl

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Re: What not to do in Vegas
« Reply #12 on: September 22, 2004, 03:45:02 pm »


I like South Beach much more.  But that's just a subjective opinion.



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Offline Hexx

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Re: What not to do in Vegas
« Reply #13 on: September 22, 2004, 03:51:00 pm »
You mean it's a big deal for you guys to have full nudity + alcohol at
a strip club?

What a funny little country you've got there...
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Offline likkerpig

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Re: What not to do in Vegas
« Reply #14 on: September 22, 2004, 03:55:32 pm »
You mean it's a big deal for you guys to have full nudity + alcohol at
a strip club?

What a funny little country you've got there...

So true!
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Offline KAT J'inn

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Re: What not to do in Vegas
« Reply #15 on: September 22, 2004, 04:46:12 pm »
You mean it's a big deal for you guys to have full nudity + alcohol at
a strip club?

What a funny little country you've got there...

Good point,  but here it's human females that are naked.  It's a subtile difference.


<snicker>

 

Offline KAT J'inn

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Re: What not to do in Vegas
« Reply #16 on: September 22, 2004, 04:47:34 pm »


I like South Beach much more.  But that's just a subjective opinion.



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Offline KAT MRess

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Re: What not to do in Vegas
« Reply #17 on: September 22, 2004, 05:21:17 pm »
You mean it's a big deal for you guys to have full nudity + alcohol at
a strip club?

What a funny little country you've got there...

I know of a place where:

the girls are totally naked,
they always serve no matter the state of dress (or undress) of the dancers,
the legal age is only 19, AND
the lovely ladies will even sit on your lap under these conditions.




Wanna know where it is?

 
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Offline Hexx

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Re: What not to do in Vegas
« Reply #18 on: September 22, 2004, 05:33:39 pm »
You mean it's a big deal for you guys to have full nudity + alcohol at
a strip club?

What a funny little country you've got there...

I know of a place where:

the girls are totally naked,
they always serve no matter the state of dress (or undress) of the dancers,
the legal age is only 19, AND
the lovely ladies will even sit on your lap under these conditions.




Wanna know where it is?

 

Well pretty much anywhere in Canada I'm thinking..
(except of course Halifax... seems the port city doesn't have any clubs?)
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Offline likkerpig

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Re: What not to do in Vegas
« Reply #19 on: September 22, 2004, 06:29:21 pm »
You mean it's a big deal for you guys to have full nudity + alcohol at
a strip club?

What a funny little country you've got there...

I know of a place where:

the girls are totally naked,
they always serve no matter the state of dress (or undress) of the dancers,
the legal age is only 19, AND
the lovely ladies will even sit on your lap under these conditions.




Wanna know where it is?

 

Can't be Alberta, legal age is 18 here...
wonder if that is why I moved out here at that age...
memory is foggy, long time (and many dead brain cells) ago...
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