Topic: ATTN H.R.H. Fluf

[_SSCF_Hooch]

During the Man-Kzin Wars, a strange religious faction appeared within the Kzinti ranks, worshipping the ideal of Kdapt. Kdaptism preached that the Creator made humans and not Kzinti, in his own image. Though this religion was most often the venue of low-born families, there were a few Kzinti in the greater nobility who also subscribed to Kdaptism.
When Kdaptist disciples prayed, they wore masks of human skin in the hopes of confusing the Creator long enough for the Kzinti to win the war. Human psychologists suggest that hundreds of years of steady losses of their greatest warriors tore at the social and psychological infrastructure of the Kzinti race, who believed their destiny to be no less than domination of the universe. The disbelief created by the losses in turn created Kdaptism.

When asked for their opinion about this theory, Kzinti mutter something untranslatable in the Hero's Tongue.

Food for thought...

[KAT Chuut-Ritt]

Don't worry Hooch, you face is way too ugly for a Kdaptist mask.  Now that new body of yours..........

And a new religon is forming on Earth.

[FPF-AJTK]

Man,dats one beeg puzzy

[C-Los]

I think someone needs a 'Breast Reduction".....

                   

[_SSCF_Hooch]

2419
 UNSN Catskinner reaches Alpha Centauri and shatters the spine of the Kzin Command. Catskinner and her crew are captured by Ulf Markham of the "Free Wunderland Navy". Chuut-Riit is eaten by his children. (MKW2 "The Children's Hour")
 

[/glow]

Hmmmm

[KAT Chuut-Ritt]

Yup, that was my ancestor who I am named for, Kinda explains why i carouse with the Human females, instead of producing young with the Kzinerette. 

BTW can we call you Madame Hooch now?

And how are the Harry Potter Broomstick riding lessons going?



those are broomstick right?  or are the Federation Ensigns just excited by your new G-racks?

[FPF-DieHard]

I think someone needs a 'Breast Reduction".....

                   

That could be considered a war crime!!!

[FPF-DrAzteca]

After a short break due some legal issues, Im happy to announce my office is once again open for bussines <snickers>

[KBFLordKrueg]

Why did I think I saw H & R Puff'n'Stuff in the title?

Wow, are you showing yer age there...If I hear a golden flute...

[KAT Chuut-Ritt]

Hmmm......



Kinda looks like Kroma in formalwear...............

[Mazeppa]

KZINTI INFORMATION MINISTRY

TOP SECRET



DATE: T?hres 45, Fluf 1

TO:   HRH

FM:   MinInt

Re:     Alliances


To His Most Viciousness, Patriarch Fluf:


I, J?inn, your most humble and adorable Servant report and inquire as follows . . .


1)   Latest reconnaissance reports indicate that the Hydrans are close to contacting the Federation.   Despite our warnings to the Hairless Ones it seems their bureaucracy simply will not act on the behalf of the Hydrans without a more direct plea for help.   Hopefully, the Hydrans will be successful.   We are doing what we can to assist but our resources are low.

2)   The Klingons have continued to assault Kzinti space. Of this you are aware.  However, I must report to you that the Ministry?s Analysts have concluded that M?Raa itself will fall within five years if we do not receive aid from an outside power.   The reporting Analysts have been executed for their unsupportive view of course. 

3)    I must question our continued alliance with the ?do nothing? Federation.   They have offered no help other than their renowned ability to talk the enemy to death.   If they are not with us, they are against us.  Besides, they just smell so delicious.   Especially when they have eaten garlic.  Think of it, no fangs, no claws, no fur, no horns. Just soft and pink.   Mmmm!!   Really, I think we should approach the Gorn about an Alliance.   They are true warriors and lets face it, not very appetizing.    Plus, don?t get me started about that pompous jerk Kirk.  Hero my hind quarters.   A real hero would march into the Federation Council and demand that the every Klingon be killed, dipped in Harrrish Sauce and eaten!

Lets do lunch.


------- END ---------

Gift of prophecy?

[KAT MRess]

M'ress touches a button on the console.

"Oh Miss Tr'rin??? Would you come in here please?"

Tr'rin enters the room with a PADD and sits in the chair opposite.

"Actually no dictation will be needed. I have a dangerous mission for you."

Tr'rins heart surged at the thought of doing something exciting instead of filing and schedule arrangement.

"Yes sire. What is it? Covert mission? Data extraction?"

"This is very important to the hegemony.You must deliver this breif to Minister J'inn and return with a response."

Tr'rins heart sank. The downcast look gave her away.

"Don't worry, of all the missions you'll ever perform this will be one of the most dangerous."

She looked at him dubiously. "Delivering messages, dangerous?"


"You've obviously never been to J'inns office. Especially when SR is not around."