Topic: "Name That J'inn" Thread (Read 9635 times)

Hexx · « **on:** July 26, 2004, 08:10:13 pm »

Having noticed that J'inns name has changed yet again, I was thinking that we should get a collection of one line quips to describe him gathered here.
Then maybe once a week (or every day.. even hour if you get bored) someone can get into his system and change it.
Maybe have some sort of "prize" on GW3 for who comes up with the best ones...

Capt_Bearslayer_XC · « **Reply #1 on:** July 26, 2004, 08:37:37 pm »

Have you been playing in the 'nip' again?

Strafer · « **Reply #2 on:** July 26, 2004, 08:38:53 pm »

Uhm....

"Have Rex, Will' carry"?

SSCF-LeRoy · « **Reply #3 on:** July 26, 2004, 09:23:38 pm »

How 'bout, "I break for asteroids"?

FPF-AJTK · « **Reply #4 on:** July 26, 2004, 09:28:45 pm »

Im gonna laugh my ass off when you guys have the Deputy show up with the court summons.

FireSoul · « **Reply #5 on:** July 26, 2004, 09:46:54 pm »

Quote from: AJTK on July 26, 2004, 09:28:45 pm

Im gonna laugh my ass off when you guys have the Deputy show up with the court summons.

On what charge? Public Disturbance Due To Excessive Laughter?

FPF-AJTK · « **Reply #6 on:** July 26, 2004, 09:52:51 pm »

Quote from: FireSoul on July 26, 2004, 09:46:54 pm

Quote from: AJTK on July 26, 2004, 09:28:45 pm
Im gonna laugh my ass off when you guys have the Deputy show up with the court summons.

On what charge? Public Disturbance Due To Excessive Laughter?

No, for F'in with a lawyer who has a wife that likes to shop ALOT and that just came back from a shopping trip in FLorida. Boys gotta pay off the plastic somehow!

Im quite sure that J'inn, being both an IRL lawyer AND an SFB/SFC lawyer can think of SOMETHING to charge em with!

Capt_Bearslayer_XC · « **Reply #7 on:** July 26, 2004, 09:56:01 pm »

AJTK,

You forget the number one rule of suing people...

You don't sue POOR people.

Hard as hell to get blood from a turnip.

FireSoul · « **Reply #8 on:** July 26, 2004, 10:59:21 pm »

awww.. even a lawyer needs a valid charge to be able to do this..

.. heck.. isn't it true that even demons have to follow the law of their contracts to the letter?

-- Luc

KAT J'inn · « **Reply #9 on:** July 27, 2004, 09:37:26 am »

Somewhere . . . in the Capitol of the Free World. In a non-descript building sitting between The Palm and a famous Gentleman's Club . . . .

A wrinkled hand with long fingernails slides across an old oak desk. Past the candles burning in their gargoyle holders. It seems to have an odd nervous twitch. Something about HAVING HIS LAST NERVE PLUCKED!!! to be sure.

It grasps an old tome. TORTS 'R US, by J'inn is written on it's spine.

"Underestimate me will they," a cackling voice utters. "Let's see . . . Incest, no, Investment Fraud, no, Ink Spills on Your Neighboors Linens, no. Here we go . . . Intentional Infliction of Emotional Distress. Yes, I feel distressed. <sniff> Very distressed."

A hideous cackle is heard through the halls of the old building.

Kroma BaSyl · « **Reply #10 on:** July 27, 2004, 09:48:23 am »

Quote from: AJTK on July 26, 2004, 09:52:51 pm

No, for F'in with a lawyer who has a wife that likes to shop ALOT and that just came back from a shopping trip in FLorida.

How about defamation of character (OK that would be a strech) or liable?

FPF-Tobin Dax · « **Reply #11 on:** July 27, 2004, 10:12:32 am »

How about something to do with honesty? Oh, pardon me. I forgot what profession we were talking about.

Kroma BaSyl · « **Reply #12 on:** July 27, 2004, 10:16:12 am »

Quote from: TobinDax on July 27, 2004, 10:12:32 am

How about something to do with honesty?

Yeah like, "Jinn, The <cough> Trusted <cough>

GDA-S'Cipio · « **Reply #13 on:** July 27, 2004, 10:17:26 am »

I think you've all forgotten his most dangerous threat. Even if he can't sue you, his profession still puts him in continuing contact with less-than-savory people; who now owe him favors.

Quote

J'inn threatened:
I have ways of knowing exactly where you live and exactly how much it will cost to send an escort service to your house when your wife is home. A male escort. In drag. Complaining about your overdue account with him/her.

-S'Cipio

KAT J'inn · « **Reply #14 on:** July 27, 2004, 10:20:41 am »

Quote from: TobinDax on July 27, 2004, 10:12:32 am

honesty

*gasp*

*wheeze*

*cough*

*ACCCCKKKKK* <coughs up hairball>

Oh that was a good one. I feel much better now.

Honesty. BWAHHAHAHHAHHAHAHHHAH!

Silly humans.

Next they'll say something about "truth" BWAHAHAHAHAHAH Man, I love you pink hairless little midday snacks. You crack me up. I don't care what Green sez about you. Yer okay.

FPF-DieHard · « **Reply #15 on:** July 27, 2004, 10:24:43 am »

Quote from: J'inn on July 27, 2004, 10:20:41 am

Next they'll say something about "truth" BWAHAHAHAHAHAH Man, I love you pink hairless little midday snacks. You crack me up. I don't care what Green sez about you. Yer okay.

Feds are friends, not food!

FPF-Tobin Dax · « **Reply #16 on:** July 27, 2004, 11:13:13 am »

Perhaps a reprint of some material for inspiration is in order.

The Post Office just recalled their latest stamps. They had pictures of lawyers on them, and people couldn't figure out which side to spit on

How does an attorney sleep? First he lies on one side, and then he lies on the other.

How many lawyer jokes are there? Only One. The rest are true stories.

How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb? How many can you afford?

How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. One to climb the ladder, one to shake it, and one to sue the ladder company.

What did the lawyer name his daughter? Sue.

What do you call a lawyer gone bad? Senator.

What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50 ? Your honor.

What do you throw to a drowning lawyer? His partners.

Vaul · « **Reply #17 on:** July 27, 2004, 01:50:55 pm »

True story: Southampton (UK), being a university town, has it's fair share of pubs. Well....the Union had to replace the 18-hole pub crawl with a 36-hole one (including Jesters, the third worst dive in Britain)

Two of the pubs? "The Crooked Lawyer" and "The Bent Brief". On the same street. Two doors apart. Neither popular with the legal department...

FireSoul · « **Reply #18 on:** July 27, 2004, 02:07:09 pm »

Yeah, but you'll be happy to know there's a pub here in Ottawa .. right here in the market in fact... called "The Honest Lawyer".

http://www.fyiottawa.com/cgi-bin/niveau2.cgi?s=club&p=38782.html&a=1

-- Luc

FPF-AJTK · « **Reply #19 on:** July 27, 2004, 06:51:34 pm »

I TOLD you, hahahahha!

Youve at least got a computer and $20 a month for an isp, more than enough for J'inn to get back a few pounds of flesh, lol!

Yeah, J'inn, what DH said. Freds are ALLIES. Although a Fred vs Mirazinti server would ROCK. Specialy if it was an early server to represent the original Fred vs Mirazinti war... Slow drones, crap fighters... ahh yes!

Honest and Lawyer in the same thread? <snicker>

Hexx · « **Reply #20 on:** July 27, 2004, 06:58:58 pm »

Quote from: FireSoul on July 27, 2004, 02:07:09 pm

Yeah, but you'll be happy to know there's a pub here in Ottawa .. right here in the market in fact... called "The Honest Lawyer".

http://www.fyiottawa.com/cgi-bin/niveau2.cgi?s=club&p=38782.html&a=1

-- Luc

Fantastic bar if you're in the Nation's Capital

-Even if the name is something of an oxymoron.

Astarte · « **Reply #21 on:** July 27, 2004, 07:10:19 pm »

Quote from: Hexx on July 27, 2004, 06:58:58 pm

Quote from: FireSoul on July 27, 2004, 02:07:09 pm
Yeah, but you'll be happy to know there's a pub here in Ottawa .. right here in the market in fact... called "The Honest Lawyer".

http://www.fyiottawa.com/cgi-bin/niveau2.cgi?s=club&p=38782.html&a=1

-- Luc

Fantastic bar if you're in the Nation's Capital

-Even if the name is something of an oxymoron.

*eyes Hexx suspiciously*

*runs to check the bushes outside for signs of Hexx stalking*

*looks to FireSoul*

You and Strafer haven't been bringing home strays have you?

Strafer · « **Reply #22 on:** July 27, 2004, 07:29:22 pm »

Quote from: Astarte on July 27, 2004, 07:10:19 pm

Quote from: Hexx on July 27, 2004, 06:58:58 pm
Quote from: FireSoul on July 27, 2004, 02:07:09 pm
Yeah, but you'll be happy to know there's a pub here in Ottawa .. right here in the market in fact... called "The Honest Lawyer".

http://www.fyiottawa.com/cgi-bin/niveau2.cgi?s=club&p=38782.html&a=1

-- Luc

Fantastic bar if you're in the Nation's Capital

-Even if the name is something of an oxymoron.

*eyes Hexx suspiciously*

*runs to check the bushes outside for signs of Hexx stalking*

*looks to FireSoul*

You and Strafer haven't been bringing home strays have you?

Nah, he's just from Halifax...

Hexx · « **Reply #23 on:** July 27, 2004, 07:42:31 pm »

Actually born in Halifax, moved to Ottawa when I was thirteen, now back in Halifax .

I (don't really) get around...

Green · « **Reply #24 on:** July 27, 2004, 08:02:07 pm »

Quote from: Scipio_66 on July 27, 2004, 10:17:26 am

I think you've all forgotten his most dangerous threat. Even if he can't sue you, his profession still puts him in continuing contact with less-than-savory people; who now owe him favors.

-S'Cipio

Scip, that implies he actually won a case. Trust me ... we're safe.

Hexx · « **Reply #25 on:** July 27, 2004, 08:16:11 pm »

Quote from: Green on July 27, 2004, 08:02:07 pm

Quote from: Scipio_66 on July 27, 2004, 10:17:26 am
I think you've all forgotten his most dangerous threat. Even if he can't sue you, his profession still puts him in continuing contact with less-than-savory people; who now owe him favors.

-S'Cipio

Scip, that implies he actually won a case. Trust me ... we're safe.

LOL ahh my new favourite quip...

KAT J'inn · « **Reply #26 on:** July 28, 2004, 07:36:12 am »

Quote from: Green on July 27, 2004, 08:02:07 pm

Quote from: Scipio_66 on July 27, 2004, 10:17:26 am
I think you've all forgotten his most dangerous threat. Even if he can't sue you, his profession still puts him in continuing contact with less-than-savory people; who now owe him favors.

-S'Cipio

Scip, that implies he actually won a case. Trust me ... we're safe.

SNARL!!!

Gook · « **Reply #27 on:** July 28, 2004, 07:46:47 am »

Quote from: J'inn on July 27, 2004, 09:37:26 am

Somewhere . . . in the Capitol of the Free World. In a non-descript building sitting between The Palm and a famous Gentleman's Club . . . .

A wrinkled hand with long fingernails slides across an old oak desk. Past the candles burning in their gargoyle holders. It seems to have an odd nervous twitch. Something about HAVING HIS LAST NERVE PLUCKED!!! to be sure.

It grasps an old tome. TORTS 'R US, by J'inn is written on it's spine.

"Underestimate me will they," a cackling voice utters. "Let's see . . . Incest, no, Investment Fraud, no, Ink Spills on Your Neighboors Linens, no. Here we go . . . Intentional Infliction of Emotional Distress. Yes, I feel distressed. <sniff> Very distressed."

A hideous cackle is heard through the halls of the old building.

Ah J'inn you forgot the Volenti non fit inuria defence

KAT J'inn · « **Reply #28 on:** July 28, 2004, 12:13:42 pm »

Quote from: Gook on July 28, 2004, 07:46:47 am

Quote from: J'inn on July 27, 2004, 09:37:26 am
Somewhere . . . in the Capitol of the Free World. In a non-descript building sitting between The Palm and a famous Gentleman's Club . . . .

A wrinkled hand with long fingernails slides across an old oak desk. Past the candles burning in their gargoyle holders. It seems to have an odd nervous twitch. Something about HAVING HIS LAST NERVE PLUCKED!!! to be sure.

It grasps an old tome. TORTS 'R US, by J'inn is written on it's spine.

"Underestimate me will they," a cackling voice utters. "Let's see . . . Incest, no, Investment Fraud, no, Ink Spills on Your Neighboors Linens, no. Here we go . . . Intentional Infliction of Emotional Distress. Yes, I feel distressed. <sniff> Very distressed."

A hideous cackle is heard through the halls of the old building.

Ah J'inn you forgot the Volenti non fit inuria defence

HEY!!! You keep out of this! I had to go dig out a Black's Law Dictionary for that one! Nothing worse than a Kzinti lawyer, I swear! GRRRRR! How it got under that stack of Las Vegas magazines and the Larry Flint reading section is beyond me. Damn law library is a mess.

To the point however:

Quit defending these unwashed holligans. I have not consented to this abuse!

FireSoul · « **Reply #29 on:** July 28, 2004, 12:19:13 pm »

Quote from: J'inn on July 28, 2004, 12:13:42 pm

Quit defending these unwashed holligans. I have not consented to this abuse!

Hey. Didn't you click on "I Agree" when you joined the forums?

Didja read the fine print?

-- Luc

Gook · « **Reply #30 on:** July 28, 2004, 12:20:47 pm »

Quote

Quit defending these unwashed holligans. I have not consented to this abuse!

I take my learned friend's point and withdraw the defence of "voluntary assumption of risk"

Love the Mall Mule ref though

Vaul · « **Reply #31 on:** July 28, 2004, 01:16:25 pm »

On the other hand, he's probably been in contact with lots of unsavoury people who don't owe him any favours...I think we can still enter a plea of vis-ne faciem capite repletam

McGib · « **Reply #32 on:** July 29, 2004, 03:42:30 pm »

Quote from: FireSoul on July 27, 2004, 02:07:09 pm

Yeah, but you'll be happy to know there's a pub here in Ottawa .. right here in the market in fact... called "The Honest Lawyer".

http://www.fyiottawa.com/cgi-bin/niveau2.cgi?s=club&p=38782.html&a=1

-- Luc

Well if you gotta be in Ottawa you might as well as be drunk

FireSoul · « **Reply #33 on:** July 29, 2004, 10:02:02 pm »

Quote from: McGib on July 29, 2004, 03:42:30 pm

Quote from: FireSoul on July 27, 2004, 02:07:09 pm
Yeah, but you'll be happy to know there's a pub here in Ottawa .. right here in the market in fact... called "The Honest Lawyer".

http://www.fyiottawa.com/cgi-bin/niveau2.cgi?s=club&p=38782.html&a=1

-- Luc

Well if you gotta be in Ottawa you might as well as be drunk

HEY!
I *live* here!

KAT J'inn · « **Reply #34 on:** July 30, 2004, 08:17:09 am »

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Where did "Lord J'inn" GO!!!???

SSCF-LeRoy · « **Reply #35 on:** July 30, 2004, 09:14:11 am »

Quote from: J'inn on July 30, 2004, 08:17:09 am

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Where did "Lord J'inn" GO!!!???

Scared off by the ultrasonic squirrels from Stephen's thread perhaps?

FireSoul · « **Reply #36 on:** July 30, 2004, 10:46:05 am »

Quote from: J'inn on July 30, 2004, 08:17:09 am

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Where did "Lord J'inn" GO!!!???

"Oh Lord.

J'inn."

KAT Chuut-Ritt · « **Reply #37 on:** July 30, 2004, 01:47:27 pm »

Yo J'inn why not try the title "This space for rent"?

You might could turn the whole fiasco into a money maker......

Of course as your agent I get 20%

Vaul · « **Reply #38 on:** July 30, 2004, 04:43:17 pm »

20% of the abuse, coming right up

KAT Chuut-Ritt · « **Reply #39 on:** July 31, 2004, 02:54:46 am »

Quote from: Vaul on July 30, 2004, 04:43:17 pm

20% of the abuse, coming right up

Bring it one no problem I can defend myself,

Yet to find my equal when it comes to forum abuse although I'll give honorable mention to

Gwarlock and Croup.

All others are severly deficient.

SSCF-LeRoy · « **Reply #40 on:** July 31, 2004, 09:32:03 am »

Quote from: KAT Chuut-Ritt on July 31, 2004, 02:54:46 am

Quote from: Vaul on July 30, 2004, 04:43:17 pm
20% of the abuse, coming right up

Bring it one no problem I can defend myself,

Yet to find my equal when it comes to forum abuse although I'll give honorable mention to

Gwarlock and Croup.

All others are severly deficient.

"Brave words. I've them before... from thousands of species across thousands of worlds since long before you were created. Now...they're all... OWN3D!!!"

-Borg Queen (creative adaptation)

DAnahos_XC · « **Reply #41 on:** July 31, 2004, 09:33:41 am »

Good stuff.

Props to everyone and also to J'inn for being one hell of a good sport.

Oh, J'inn, did you ever get a chance to nail the doc's secretary?

Sirgod · « **Reply #42 on:** August 01, 2004, 02:10:07 pm »

J'inns newest Legal Case...

Stephen

News:

Topic: "Name That J'inn" Thread (Read 9635 times) var addthis_config = {"data_track_clickback":true};

Topic: "Name That J'inn" Thread (Read 9635 times)