Topic: Sirgod Helps with X-mas Disisions.  (Read 2469 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Sirgod

  • Guest
Sirgod Helps with X-mas Disisions.
« on: December 18, 2003, 02:09:31 pm »
I know alot of you are looking for the perfect gift for your loved one or Dear friend.

Sorry Can't help you, But I can tell you what not to buy, Based on Products Warning labels.

Here is a list of things not to buy, and the Various warnings involved.

 
Quote:

On a blanket from Taiwan:
Not to be used as protection from a tornado.

Warning on fireplace log:
Caution -- Risk of Fire.

A warning on a pair of shin guards manufactured for bicyclists:
Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover.

Warning on an electric router made for carpenters:
This product not intended for use as a dental drill.

On a bottle of shampoo for dogs:
Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish.

On a hair dryer:
Do not use in shower.

On Marks & Spencer bread pudding
Product will be hot after heating.

On a string of Chinese made Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: Contains nuts.

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions - open packet, eat nuts.

On some frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: defrost.

On a hotel provided shower cap:
Fits one head.

On Nytol Nighttime Sleep-Aid:
Warning: May cause drowsiness.

Warning on a cartridge for a laser printer:
Do not eat toner.

A wheel 13" a wheelbarrow warns:
Not for highway use.

Can of self-defense pepper spray warns:
May irritate eyes.

Warning on a Conair Pro Style 1600 hair dryer:
Do not use in shower. Never use while sleeping.

Silly Putty package warning:
Not for use as earplugs.

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

Baby stroller warning:
Remove child before folding.

Household iron warns:
Never iron clothes while they are being worn.

A fireplace lighter cautions:
Do not use near fire, flame or sparks.

A handheld massager warns consumers:
Don't use while sleeping or unconscious.

Warning on underarm deodorant:
Do not spray in eyes.

Cardboard car sun shield that keeps sun off the dashboards warns
Do not drive with sun shield in place

Warning on a sharpening stone:
Knives are sharp.

Bottle water label warns:
Twist top off with hands. Throw top away. Do not put top in mouth.

On a box or rat poison
Warning: Has been found to cause cancer in laboratory mice.

On a Domino's Pizza box
Caution: Contents hot!

Toilet bowl cleaning brush warns:
Do not use orally.

An electric cattle prods warns:
For use on animals only

A can of air freshner warns:
Keep out of reach of children and teenagers

Cheap rubber ball toy warning:
Choking hazard: This toy is a small ball.

Caution on a package of dice:
Not for human consumption.

In the manual of a chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop the blade with your hand.

Stamped on the barrel of a .22 calibre rifle:
Warning: Misuse may cause injury or death.

Instructions for an electric thermometer:
Do not use orally after using rectally.

On the wrapper of a Fruit Roll-Up snack:
Remove plastic before eating.

A TV remote controller warns:
Not dishwasher safe.


 




Stephen

DreadlordGW

  • Guest
Re: Sirgod Helps with X-mas Disisions.
« Reply #1 on: December 18, 2003, 02:46:56 pm »
I love those kindsa things!

Sirgod

  • Guest
Re: Sirgod Helps with X-mas Disisions.
« Reply #2 on: December 18, 2003, 03:46:16 pm »
same here man. I still recall the guy who Got arrested for using preperation H.

He read on the tube: For external use Only, and was picked up For Indescent Exposure in his own Backyard.

Stephen

TB613

  • Guest
Re: Sirgod Helps with X-mas Disisions.
« Reply #3 on: December 18, 2003, 04:00:45 pm »
Actually this one makes sense.
 
Quote:

 A wheel 13" a wheelbarrow warns:
Not for highway use.



There are some small trailer tires that have the same wheel diameters as the low speed tires that are used on utility equipment such as wheelbarrows.

The scarry part about those that are not fractured translations is that someone somewhere was stupid enough to have done those things.

 

SL-Punisher

  • Guest
Re: Sirgod Helps with X-mas Disisions.
« Reply #4 on: December 18, 2003, 04:22:29 pm »
We wouldn't want those circus clown cars using those 13" tires hehe

Sirgod

  • Guest
Sirgod Helps with X-mas Disisions.
« Reply #5 on: December 18, 2003, 02:09:31 pm »
I know alot of you are looking for the perfect gift for your loved one or Dear friend.

Sorry Can't help you, But I can tell you what not to buy, Based on Products Warning labels.

Here is a list of things not to buy, and the Various warnings involved.

 
Quote:

On a blanket from Taiwan:
Not to be used as protection from a tornado.

Warning on fireplace log:
Caution -- Risk of Fire.

A warning on a pair of shin guards manufactured for bicyclists:
Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover.

Warning on an electric router made for carpenters:
This product not intended for use as a dental drill.

On a bottle of shampoo for dogs:
Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish.

On a hair dryer:
Do not use in shower.

On Marks & Spencer bread pudding
Product will be hot after heating.

On a string of Chinese made Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: Contains nuts.

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions - open packet, eat nuts.

On some frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: defrost.

On a hotel provided shower cap:
Fits one head.

On Nytol Nighttime Sleep-Aid:
Warning: May cause drowsiness.

Warning on a cartridge for a laser printer:
Do not eat toner.

A wheel 13" a wheelbarrow warns:
Not for highway use.

Can of self-defense pepper spray warns:
May irritate eyes.

Warning on a Conair Pro Style 1600 hair dryer:
Do not use in shower. Never use while sleeping.

Silly Putty package warning:
Not for use as earplugs.

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

Baby stroller warning:
Remove child before folding.

Household iron warns:
Never iron clothes while they are being worn.

A fireplace lighter cautions:
Do not use near fire, flame or sparks.

A handheld massager warns consumers:
Don't use while sleeping or unconscious.

Warning on underarm deodorant:
Do not spray in eyes.

Cardboard car sun shield that keeps sun off the dashboards warns
Do not drive with sun shield in place

Warning on a sharpening stone:
Knives are sharp.

Bottle water label warns:
Twist top off with hands. Throw top away. Do not put top in mouth.

On a box or rat poison
Warning: Has been found to cause cancer in laboratory mice.

On a Domino's Pizza box
Caution: Contents hot!

Toilet bowl cleaning brush warns:
Do not use orally.

An electric cattle prods warns:
For use on animals only

A can of air freshner warns:
Keep out of reach of children and teenagers

Cheap rubber ball toy warning:
Choking hazard: This toy is a small ball.

Caution on a package of dice:
Not for human consumption.

In the manual of a chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop the blade with your hand.

Stamped on the barrel of a .22 calibre rifle:
Warning: Misuse may cause injury or death.

Instructions for an electric thermometer:
Do not use orally after using rectally.

On the wrapper of a Fruit Roll-Up snack:
Remove plastic before eating.

A TV remote controller warns:
Not dishwasher safe.


 




Stephen

DreadlordGW

  • Guest
Re: Sirgod Helps with X-mas Disisions.
« Reply #6 on: December 18, 2003, 02:46:56 pm »
I love those kindsa things!

Sirgod

  • Guest
Re: Sirgod Helps with X-mas Disisions.
« Reply #7 on: December 18, 2003, 03:46:16 pm »
same here man. I still recall the guy who Got arrested for using preperation H.

He read on the tube: For external use Only, and was picked up For Indescent Exposure in his own Backyard.

Stephen

TB613

  • Guest
Re: Sirgod Helps with X-mas Disisions.
« Reply #8 on: December 18, 2003, 04:00:45 pm »
Actually this one makes sense.
 
Quote:

 A wheel 13" a wheelbarrow warns:
Not for highway use.



There are some small trailer tires that have the same wheel diameters as the low speed tires that are used on utility equipment such as wheelbarrows.

The scarry part about those that are not fractured translations is that someone somewhere was stupid enough to have done those things.

 

SL-Punisher

  • Guest
Re: Sirgod Helps with X-mas Disisions.
« Reply #9 on: December 18, 2003, 04:22:29 pm »
We wouldn't want those circus clown cars using those 13" tires hehe

Sirgod

  • Guest
Sirgod Helps with X-mas Disisions.
« Reply #10 on: December 18, 2003, 02:09:31 pm »
I know alot of you are looking for the perfect gift for your loved one or Dear friend.

Sorry Can't help you, But I can tell you what not to buy, Based on Products Warning labels.

Here is a list of things not to buy, and the Various warnings involved.

 
Quote:

On a blanket from Taiwan:
Not to be used as protection from a tornado.

Warning on fireplace log:
Caution -- Risk of Fire.

A warning on a pair of shin guards manufactured for bicyclists:
Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover.

Warning on an electric router made for carpenters:
This product not intended for use as a dental drill.

On a bottle of shampoo for dogs:
Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish.

On a hair dryer:
Do not use in shower.

On Marks & Spencer bread pudding
Product will be hot after heating.

On a string of Chinese made Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: Contains nuts.

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions - open packet, eat nuts.

On some frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: defrost.

On a hotel provided shower cap:
Fits one head.

On Nytol Nighttime Sleep-Aid:
Warning: May cause drowsiness.

Warning on a cartridge for a laser printer:
Do not eat toner.

A wheel 13" a wheelbarrow warns:
Not for highway use.

Can of self-defense pepper spray warns:
May irritate eyes.

Warning on a Conair Pro Style 1600 hair dryer:
Do not use in shower. Never use while sleeping.

Silly Putty package warning:
Not for use as earplugs.

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

Baby stroller warning:
Remove child before folding.

Household iron warns:
Never iron clothes while they are being worn.

A fireplace lighter cautions:
Do not use near fire, flame or sparks.

A handheld massager warns consumers:
Don't use while sleeping or unconscious.

Warning on underarm deodorant:
Do not spray in eyes.

Cardboard car sun shield that keeps sun off the dashboards warns
Do not drive with sun shield in place

Warning on a sharpening stone:
Knives are sharp.

Bottle water label warns:
Twist top off with hands. Throw top away. Do not put top in mouth.

On a box or rat poison
Warning: Has been found to cause cancer in laboratory mice.

On a Domino's Pizza box
Caution: Contents hot!

Toilet bowl cleaning brush warns:
Do not use orally.

An electric cattle prods warns:
For use on animals only

A can of air freshner warns:
Keep out of reach of children and teenagers

Cheap rubber ball toy warning:
Choking hazard: This toy is a small ball.

Caution on a package of dice:
Not for human consumption.

In the manual of a chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop the blade with your hand.

Stamped on the barrel of a .22 calibre rifle:
Warning: Misuse may cause injury or death.

Instructions for an electric thermometer:
Do not use orally after using rectally.

On the wrapper of a Fruit Roll-Up snack:
Remove plastic before eating.

A TV remote controller warns:
Not dishwasher safe.


 




Stephen

DreadlordGW

  • Guest
Re: Sirgod Helps with X-mas Disisions.
« Reply #11 on: December 18, 2003, 02:46:56 pm »
I love those kindsa things!

Sirgod

  • Guest
Re: Sirgod Helps with X-mas Disisions.
« Reply #12 on: December 18, 2003, 03:46:16 pm »
same here man. I still recall the guy who Got arrested for using preperation H.

He read on the tube: For external use Only, and was picked up For Indescent Exposure in his own Backyard.

Stephen

TB613

  • Guest
Re: Sirgod Helps with X-mas Disisions.
« Reply #13 on: December 18, 2003, 04:00:45 pm »
Actually this one makes sense.
 
Quote:

 A wheel 13" a wheelbarrow warns:
Not for highway use.



There are some small trailer tires that have the same wheel diameters as the low speed tires that are used on utility equipment such as wheelbarrows.

The scarry part about those that are not fractured translations is that someone somewhere was stupid enough to have done those things.

 

SL-Punisher

  • Guest
Re: Sirgod Helps with X-mas Disisions.
« Reply #14 on: December 18, 2003, 04:22:29 pm »
We wouldn't want those circus clown cars using those 13" tires hehe